To begin with my mother never liked him. But in the start i was adamant that if i get married it will be him and only him. I also said things like if you aren’t happy and won’t support me i’ll go get married in an court one day.
But my mom kept showing her disliking. He doesn’t earn much, he is not good looking, he’s lying to you, you haven’t seen the world you are blind. This kept going on for 1.5 year or so, but i stood my ground to the point that my parents even tho they didn’t want to but they were there with me on our engagement day.
It was a small function nothing fancy. My mom did all the arrangements, bought gifts and everything.
Right after the engagement was done she lost her control, after the guests were gone she started crying. I asked her what was wrong did someone do or say anything wrong. She kept quiet. She didn’t talk to me the following week until yesterday, she came to my room and told me everything she felt. She mostly told me based on the behaviour of the family that they wouldn’t keep me happy, she said she couldn’t see the so called excitement from their side (my bf told me every one was really excited repeatedly) she judged them based on the gifts they got me… how they reacted. She was noticing every move they made. And in her eyes it was all wrong.
But the point where i gave up was just one thing, he has a pattern of leaving things unfinished. Something my mom pointed out when she didn’t even know that he had left his job without any offer. This is something i knew and where things made sense.
He left his college unfinished, he started again while working cuz he said he realised the importance of a degree but even then he couldn’t finish it and left it in the middle. He left his job when it got tough, i told him job market is tough and to leave only once he has an offer he didn’t listen. He is still jobless it’s been 2-3 months. But one thing he said to me that made me gave up was “if I don’t get a job till our marriage I’ll return the ring” this is when i felt like he will even give up on us. Even if he said it jokingly or not seriously but it is something he said.
Today it will be over, I don’t want it to end but my dad will call his dad and call off the marriage. I am totally shattered at this point and don’t know what will happen. I have been crying non stop and cursing myself that i gave up.
TLDR: my mom was never happy with my bf, we got engaged and she completely broke post that day. She told me clearly what she felt about the family by judging them on their behaviour that day and gifts they got. My bf is currently jobless, and he has a pattern of leaving things unfinished. I have given up only because of this. My dad will call off the marriage today.