I just got into a relationship with a man I really like, and we have incredible chemistry and everything is amazing except for two things regarding sex.
First off, he has a crazy high sex drive. Like, he said he wants it multiple times every day. I’m a pretty horny woman, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep up. He’s never pushy and if I don’t feel like having sex, he is always completely fine with it. I just want to make our sex life fulfilling for both of us. How can I work on improving my stamina?
Second problem is that he’s a lot bigger (longer AND more girth) than anyone I’ve been with before. The sex gets kind of uncomfortable because of his size. This ties into the first issue, because I know that I would be more up to having sex multiple times in a day if it wasn’t uncomfortable. Will my body get used to it? Or is there anything I can do?
4 comments
Perhaps supplement with a few more blowjobs throughout the day? If he’s okay with that for now and if you don’t mind providing him that? He could return the favor as well and that could be easier on you and perhaps even help you slowly adjust. He’s gonna have to understand how you feel and your comfort level until you can get more used to his size.
Hi, idk how long you have been dating your partner but I had a similar size issue with my current partner when we first started dating and my body absolutely did adjust after a while. We always do lots of foreplay and lots of lube but the first few weeks (maybe a month?) it was challenging and we had to start really slowly. My partner is like 7.5 inches and girthy. Like I can’t wrap my hand completely around it. I don’t know if it’s because my body just got used to it or because I’m more comfortable and relaxed now knowing that it won’t hurt. Lube and foreplay are still key for me. Also, experiment with different positions because some are easier for you to control the depth (ex. Cowgirl) and some can really get too deep (soggy style for me but ymmv). Can’t help you with the mismatch of libido though. It sounds like even if your partner is perpetually horny at least he is respectful of you saying no and not pushy.
You will absolutely get used to his size. It just takes time. My first sexual partner was massive. Like porn actor big! Which ended up being amazing, but those first few months were really rough. To be fair, he was my first, being a virgin didn’t help, but we were having sex almost daily for 2 or 3 months before it stopped hurting. He always had to start kind of slow but once I got used to the stretch, the feeling was so so great! As far as his drive goes, there’s nothing wrong with wanting it multiple times a day. And the fact that he’s not being oushy about it means he really respects you and the relationship. I think once your body adjusts to his size and gets comfortable, having sex a few times a day will be very doable. And it will help maintain the connection and keep the fore going.
Open your mind to having sex be a wider range of activity. Honestly, taking a dick into your body can be a thing you need some downtime to recover from. If you two can also be happy enjoying other kinds of touch – hands, lips, boobs – that find orgasm for each other without you needing to be pounded, that can be a good thing. A great thing.