I’ve posted elsewhere about some issues I’m having with my wife, and our sex life. I want to set that aside and get the group’s pulse on something else: when I posted about our issues, I got a lot of questions, both on the thread and in chats, about communicating with my wife about sex. Not just my complaints (maybe minimize those for once!) but on what she likes, desires, what feels good, and explore kinks, and what other men have done that she enjoyed etc. Basically set my own fragile ego aside and listen. Good advice.
However, my wife basically refuses to talk about sex. In any way. Positive or negative. Nothing.
Has nothing to do with upbringing, trauma, religion, anything like that. Just won’t get into it or spend any time exploring.
Similarly, adding things in is a no-no. No toys, no lingerie, she even got rid of her thongs.
Lots of good advice about finding out if her needs are being met, but how do I get there?