I’ve been in love with a girl since the 6th grade, and for all these years, I’ve kept those feelings inside. From the moment we met, something about her just stayed with me. She’s been a constant presence in my heart, even as life took us in different directions. I never found the right time to tell her how I truly felt—maybe out of fear of rejection, or maybe because I always thought there would be a better moment down the line. But now, so much has changed. We don’t even live in the same country anymore, and I don’t know if I’ll ever have the chance to see her again.
What makes it even harder is that I don’t know how long I have left to live. I’m dealing with a health issue that makes the future feel uncertain. That reality weighs heavily on me, because if I don’t say something now, I might never get the chance. And yet, I’m caught between wanting to express everything that’s been bottled up for years and wondering if it’s even worth it. Does she still think about me? Would telling her change anything? Or is it just too late to bring this up, given all the distance and time that have passed?
It’s overwhelming to think that someone who has meant so much to me for so long might never know how I feel. But then again, what if I confess and nothing changes? I keep asking myself whether it’s better to hold onto these feelings privately, or to take the risk and finally say what I’ve been carrying in my heart for so many years. In a way, this could bring me peace, no matter the outcome—but I also fear what might happen if things don’t go as I hope. At this point, I’m left wondering whether love is enough, or whether it’s something I need to let go of, even if I don’t want to.
( Had many women come and go all this time but haven't fallen for anyone and don't think will fall and if I do it's short lived )