I met this guy on Hinge, he's 22 and just moved to my locality. He asked me out and wanted me to show him around. We've been on two dates, but right from the first one, I’ve had this weird feeling. At first, I thought it was just me overthinking, so I tried to ignore it. But now, it's getting too much, and I can’t deal with him. He’s nice, but I’m just not attracted to him, and my mind and body keep telling me to cancel plans. It’s like I'm repelled by him, and I hate this feeling. It's got me Googling whether I’m the issue or if I’m some kind of red flag. But honestly, I’m pretty happy with how things have been and feel really secure. I know what I want.
I’ve been trying to figure out why I feel like this:
Right from the first date, he started talking about how he has so many family issues, that he's lonely, no one likes him, and he doesn't have friends. I get that people share things, but these aren’t really what I’d bring up on a first date, you know?
He keeps asking me to call him. I have a busy schedule, and when I say no, he acts all sad and weird. When we do call, though, he says uncomfortable things—talks in baby voices, and mentions things he wants to do to me, which I just don’t like at all.
He’s very clingy. He’s even started tagging along with my sketching group for no reason. And now, when I told him I’m traveling to meet my friends in another city, he asked if he could come along?! It feels like he has no sense of boundaries.
When I asked him about his type or what he’s looking for, he said, "I have a lot of emotional baggage, so I guess someone who can deal with that. Looks-wise, I don't care really." It just makes me feel like he’s lonely and anyone would do for him.
He keeps texting me a lot. Like, all day long. Even if I don’t reply, he'll send 15 messages back-to-back, giving me updates about his day. We’re not even in a relationship, yet he’s already overstepping my boundaries.
This one really gets me: Every time we talk, either on the phone or in person, he asks, “How much do you weigh?” I’ve already told him once, but he keeps asking as if he’s trying to trigger me. He even said to my face, “You’re overweight,” and I was like, “Yes, and?”
Ugh, I don’t like him. I’m not attracted to him anymore, and he’s seriously pissing me off. He comes off as manipulative, like a love-bomber.