How do you avoid getting bitter after a lifetime of trauma?

20 comments

  3. I wouldn’t say I avoided getting bitter, I would say I recovered after already having become bitter. And that came as a result of years of therapy and intensive personal work.

  4. I don’t know if I have… Some days are better than others. Therapy helps.

  6. Having fun now. I like being an adult so much more than being a child. And it’s so freeing to be able to make choices about my life as a grown ass woman. I try and fill my time with the things and people I like instead of moping about me childhood and early adult years.

  8. think about what youve learned from it and were you are today. you cant change what happened to you, but the things that did happen have lead you to the place you are now, and if youre not happy with the place in which you are in now, change it. its never to late to become happy.

  9. Therapy and gratitude, as well as realising that resentment is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die.

  11. So. Much. Therapy.

    Surrounding myself with good people and creating boundaries with people who trigger me.

  12. Ya just gotta decide that you’d rather be happy instead of miserable and start climbing your way out of the hole towards that.

    You need to learn how to spite the shitty people around you by saying “Fuck it. They aren’t worth my time. I’m gonna go do X little thing cause it will make me happy. And if X little thing pisses them off then GOOD! I hope they are as miserable as they made me.”

    I decided I wanted to be happy. So I took a look at everything around me and started throwing away the things that didn’t make me feel better.

    I took a step away from people that made me feel horrible. When I couldn’t, I took joy in doing something that was harmless and fun and had the added bonus of making them sooo fucking angry.

    When I found myself trapped in a shitty situation, instead of throwing myself back into the hole of depression, I asked myself what I could control and put all my focus on that while doing my best to ignore what I couldn’t fix. Most of the time an answer on how to fix things came later. And doing so many little things often helped put me into a position where I could improve my situation.

    It takes a shit ton of work and it’s hard as hell and it takes forever. But you need to keep choosing happiness everyday and spit in the face of everything that tries to drag you back down.

  13. This is coming from a 14yo that is already tired of living and doesn’t care about their mental health so take rhis with a gain of salt.

    Try to distance yourself from people that are negative and joke about trauma i guess(i joke about mine so…) councilg does help but i think therapy is better.
    Starting to think i need therapy…
    Definitely don’t let it get to you and not clean your room at all. Keep it clean, a messy room doesn’t help. As my room is a mess and it makes me feel like shit and lazy.
    You can try to socialize a little more if your trauma involves distance yourself feom people from fear of losing them or trust issues. Just take your time doing it and not feel forced to do so. Talk to people you feel comfortable with about it and not keep it in like i did when i was 8 or 9. Definitely a big mistake on my part, and if you do that. Yours to, but we all make mistakes.

    That’s is all i an th6of at the moment that i didn’t even do or something that can possibly help.

  14. I don’t want people to hurt the way I hurt. It may be too late for me to be happy or find love, I may not deserve a good relationship, but I won’t let other people end up like me.

    That’s…it I guess. I mean, I do therapy but that’s my motivation to do therapy.

  15. hate (bitterness) is like drinking poison expecting the other person to die but you’re killing yourself

    source: lifetime of trauma. also my own ray of sunshine.

  16. The same way I avoid not getting bitter about never finding a spouse. I find other things to keep me interested.

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