We've been together 3 years and she proposed to me a month ago. She was raised very well. To the contrary, I had the misfortune of my family dying off and being homeless while very young.
I grew up moving around and with colorful characters. From 16 I started getting my first family experience while working security in strip clubs, prostitution hotel rings, and a few days working in swingers club till my early 20s when I went to college. It wasn't a party, I loved these people and it was an awful cycle where I'd grow a connection to them, then watch the drug abuse, them go missing, deaths, or whatever else. I invested so much emotion in some of them, and some really returned it. Inviting me to family parties, cooking me food, saying they loved me, and all the things I never had. Then again the pics/ videos I have are like us smiling and them in lingerie.
I can't bring myself to delete the photos/ videos of us off my computer or throw away polaroids I have. I just know its a timebomb though. My wife has heard the stories of me working these places, but seeing me around women in their underwear through these pics or vids would for sure look like I was just partying. She wouldn't get who these people were or how much they meant to me.
tl;dr my wife and i got engaged. I'm worried photos from my rough and tough life are a time bomb given the sexual nature of them. Should I just erase it all to avoid conflict, or somehow try to present it in a way where they can be kept so I may appreciate my friends that have passed and have them with me in some form.