I’d only assume someone is flirting with me if they make blatant sexual comments, wink their eyelashes at me, touch me, or make other forward moves at me. Otherwise, I assume they’re just being nice and/or they’re uncomfortable around me.

13 comments

  1. I usually don’t realize she is flirting until she says “want to go back to your place?” Or something similar

  3. Its difficult to know especially in England since we tend to flirt daily, “hi babe” “how are you beautiful?” Etc. I suppose if on a date and they start to get physical with little touches on your hand might signal interest, Other than that I have no idea, suggestive talk is generally lost on me.

    Funny side note, a new American cashier started working at our local shop, After paying I said “thanks sweetheart”, she was shocked and said “Um that’s a bit strong don’t you think?” Had to apologise and explain that I wasn’t flirting, it’s just part of British vocabulary and normal social interaction.

  4. If she’s playing with her hair, getting really close to you (inside your personal bubble), putting her hand on you more than once (like your shoulder or leg), biting her lower lip if you do/say something smooth, staring into your eyes so intently it’s like she’s looking into your soul, and laughing even at your dumbest jokes – it’s flirting.

  5. In addition to the other signals that others have said, I’ll add going out of their way to spend time with you, or find out about **your** availability, putting whatever they are doing at the time on hold, especially if it is in a public place.

  7. I hug. And am very complimentary. But am happily married. Also I am big and ugly so being flirty isn’t a massive issue.

  8. Hmm I know for me as a dude who falls way outside of the desirable scale.. There are some clear signs which are usually overly nice comments that go a bit too far and asking about personal lie ( where is your wife…) and touching or arms and legs. Beyond that I tend to miss the rest and in current climate I am a bit happier about it. You don’t want to offend anyone by being over the line in response.

  9. Never. They’re not the same thing at all. Being nice is a general social expectation. Flirting is something completely different. Men confuse them all the time because they’ve seen too much porn and think a touch on the shoulder is basically begging to suck your penis. It’s not bro. It’s not.

  10. By my standards of evaluation, she is never flirting. Nice is nice is nice and no amount of being nice will cross that line.

    If she wants flirting, she needs to make it crystal clear because society won’t let me make that presumption for her.

  11. never, someone *might* mean to be flirting with their excessive niceness but I’ll never take the fucking chance ever again

  13. I assume that “being nice” is always being nice. Only time that women are ever nice to me is when they are on the job and I am the customer, there is no way that I am going to interpret their niceness as anything other than a requirement from their job. Otherwise all I receive from women is really basic kindness, nothing noteworthy.

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    Only place that the niceness of the employees made me feel really weird was the one and only time I went to Chick-Fil-A, which was in Las Vegas, I talked to like 3 of the female employees and they talked like they wanted me to fuck their brains out, I was so fucking weirded out. Makes me wonder what kind of sick training the Chick-Fil-A employees are put through lmao

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