What are Men lacking these days?

34 comments

  3. Positive male influences

    Edit: specifically, IRL, and from a young age. Better to have a strong role model early than to scramble to make up for lost time later. If at all.

  13. Someone to properly talk to.

    Its hard to talk about problems with your mates, because not many men know how to respond to it.

    Most women in my life are also not easy to open up to. Being told to “Man up” is something pretty common.

    Even with family, friends, and a significant other, I always feel alone.

  15. Identity. The men I see struggling don’t know what to do, what they want, who they are, or even how to act in many day to day situations. Some stumble through lost, some pick up whatever flag is shoved at them and turn it into their whole personality, some go other ways. Very few end positively.

    The ones who AREN’T like that? Who know who they want to be and understand their strengths and limits to make it reasonable? They figure out how to get at least most of the way there and do okay.

    Some of that is just social readjustment we’re going through throwing up a lot of questions about what a man is, some of it is the destruction of community so many have experienced, some of it is probably associated with the drop in t levels across male populations which is associated with drive as much as it is aggression, some of it is a crushing hopelessness many feel given their current situations destroying any ability to feel like they CAN be any kind of person they’d want to be, some of it is probably the number of broken homes and overworked parents not being there to teach life skills, all sorts of shit.

    The causes and consequences are myriad and the solutions are, too. For the time being, I see more causes than solutions gaining traction. It’s not going well, and it’s not going to end well, either.

  18. – 120 gun Man O’ War
    – Crew to rely on and trust
    – Ample amounts of liquor
    – The Caribbean sun
    – Other ships to pillage, rob, and sink
    – Sharpened cutlass

    The pirate’s life. Men are missing the pirate’s life. šŸ“ā€ā˜ ļø

  19. just by some of the answers iā€™m going to say itā€™s decent role models. thereā€™s such an over saturation of ā€œlifestyle gurusā€ and ppl who fill their pockets based on normal vulnerabilities, how could they know where to turn. you have teen boys taking hateful advice from bitter divorced men or gym bros. then when they take that advice into the real world and it doesnā€™t work they get further into despair. šŸ¤·šŸ½ā€ā™€ļø just my opinion.

  28. Self-Confidence. There is to much insecurity going around in men these days. Me included. I wanna do the right thing, I wanna love myself but I do not trust myself to do the right decisions to get there. If I make the wrong decision or say something wrong, I find it hard to forgive myself.

  30. Everyone talking about how males are always the shooters recently yet no one wants to listen to the males here even when we say we need emotional support. Fuck bein a man.

  31. Lots of good answers here. To me, the biggest things I feel are lacking are rights of passage and mentorship. I feel these explain a lot or the directionlessness you see in men these days. Used to, you looked at the handful of jobs in the community, asked the dude doing one you liked to teach you. However, society has changed so radically in the past 30 years. Hell, so many jobs didn’t even exist a decade ago, so is it any wonder we see so much imposter syndrome? In religions and tribes and organizations, you went through rights of passage to tell you “You made it. You’re a man now.” Now that these are gone, what it means to be a man becomes more and more vague year by year. All we have to base it on is advertising and films, and these “role models” do not represent us.

  33. Kindness. Mostly because kindness is considered weakness in this culture and is exploited, manipulated, and disrespected at every turn.

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