I (m21) recently became interested in a girl (f24) from my study group. We have a few mutual friends and get along well during the study sessions. I recently asked her via text whether she wanted to grab a coffee sometime. She replied that she’d love to do so after a study session and that we could also ask some of the other people to join in. When i suggested a date she didn’t reply for a few days and then said she couldn’t do it that day. This to me implies she might not be very interested, especially since she didn’t suggest another date. But I’m also unsure whether she even knew i was asking her out on a date in the first place. She seems to be happy to see me when we see each other in person and her initial response was fast and positive. Would it be okay to ask her out again or would that be overstepping my bounds?
3 comments
The fact she has specifically suggested asking others along says she either doesn’t know you’re asking her out on a date or that she’s not interested in going on a date with just you. You could ask her again but if she keeps being non committal then you have your answer.
In my experience, your instincts are correct. Don’t ask her out again. She likes you, but maybe just as a friend. And if she likes you more than that, she may just be on the fence. Therefore, not asking her out again may make her wonder why and she might get curious and bring it up to you on her own. That’s when you say, “well you didn’t seem interested, so I figured I wouldn’t bother you about it again.” In the meantime, don’t waste your time with her, just ask someone else out. There are always other fish in the sea! And who knows, she may see you with this other girl and get jealous and do or say something, which is when you know you’ve dodged a bullet cuz she’s kinda crazy.
>But I’m also unsure whether she even knew i was asking her out on a date in the first place.
Oh, she knows….