It’s not like it’s been like this ever since I got on them: Bumble, Badoo, Tinder, Hinge. During the COVID lockdown I dated 4 girls off of apps, but as the lockdown slowly lifted and life went on as normal that number dropped to 0. No likes, matches, nothing. My conclusion is that people either got lonely sitting inside and needed some distraction or that some just needed someone to vent to, so their standards dropped really low.

I have no woman I interact with on a day to day basis outside of my mom and my self-confidence has been destroyed. No woman look my way, no flirting, nothing. I never ever approach because it has been instilled into me you should never, ever bother a woman.

The loneliness is destroying me and over the past few months I’ve come to accept I’ll most likely end up alone forever. I’m also turning 22 this summer and never went any further then just making out.

Can I DM some of you some screenshots of my profile and have you judge them? I’m not really comfortable showing my face on Reddit.

Thanks

31 comments

  1. I’ve noticed that dating apps now, give better results when you pay. Before Covid, I don’t remember that being the case.
    FYI. I’m a dude. Don’t send me any dick pics.

  3. Of course, go ahead.

    But, just want to tell you. My ex BF is super cute. He was on dating apps a long time and barely had any answer from women. This was before women had to give the authorization for the guy to talk to them.

    He would try to speak to 100 women at the same time to have 2 answers that would lead nowhere.

    The SAME guy women hit on every fucking day.

    He even had one client who had him on the phone, googled him after, found his picture, send him a gift with her private number at his work…

    I don’t count how many times I’ve seen his colleagues hitting on him.

    A lot of cashiers also.

    The same guy who had zero match online.

  5. Send me your profile pics and I’ll give you honest advice as I have done numerous times.

    Whatever you do, do NOT listen to those telling you to give up and stay single.

  6. Feel free to send me your profile if you want, wouldn’t mind being of assistance

  9. 20F I’m also on dating apps, well just Tinder, but I can give an honest opinion.

  13. When you interact with your mom does she think you’re handsome? Moms tell the truth

  16. i’m happy to give advice! sometimes on dating apps I see peoples profiles and i’m like, why did they put that picture first or why did they say that?? because to me personally it comes off really unattractive and i’m not sure it’s what they intended. not that my opinion necessarily matters to them or you or anyone but I personally like feedback on things so happy to share my one honest opinion for you!

  19. I got on PoF for a minute and the first women that talked to me wanted me to pay her to continue talking to me.

    I said no thanks I don’t even have an only fans subscription.

    She ended up blocking me right after that lol

  22. Dating apps are only there to take your money if they can and mine your data to sell.

  23. Dating apps have a 9:1 male to female ratio. If you are not considered handsome you will have a very very difficult time on those apps as a guy. It’s very empowering and even overwhelming for women but for men these apps are like self harm. Stay on them but realize this. I would try to seek out hobbies where you interact more with women naturally like dancing.

  24. The problem is, asking people on here, everyone views attractiveness differently, it’s subjective

  25. Same. In my experience when i was a student , i also get 0 matches despite swiping daily(i was desperate to the point i swiped every single one of my suggested) . After i changed my job title to a top 3 paying job, i get matches almost everyday in addition to girls even liking me first. I wonder why.

  26. Woman in her early 20s here, you can send them to me if you want, I would be happy to help

  27. Honestly, dating apps are a fantastic way for men to drain their self esteem. I’d honestly suggest you get rid of all of them. This is only going to get worse.

    Think of the user behaviour on the apps. Think of the ratio of men to women on dating. I’d estimate around 8 men for every woman. Plus there’s so many thirsty men who are constantly swiping right on anything, and sending copy and paste messages to any and every woman. This means women have an abundance of choice and options. Some messages simply get lost in the shuffle so to speak. This is a failing on the part of men I should add.

    I think your age may be a factor too. Women tend to look for men who are successful and have resources. It’s in their biology. A 22 year old is unlikely to have reached his peak earning potential.

    It seems like you’re struggling with self esteem and loneliness. I think these need to be addressed too. Maybe through therapy, more meaningful job, hobbies, spending more time with friends, etc

    If you want to send me your profile I can give you feedback if you like.

    So I guess I’m saying, get off the apps.

  29. The dating apps just don’t work anymore, they give you no matches unless you pay. The hell with them. We never needed them.

  30. First of all sorry for my bad english,.

    Using app dates are the worst. Ppl just use them to feed their ego’s or be selective using their own jugments.

    I give up long time ago with them to “meet new friends and date someone special”. They are fraud. At least a high % of those mates who are using them is because they have some own issues or ex’s. And dont get me wrong, thats ok but dont try to involve a stranger into ur own issues. This is my own experience at least.

    The only thing u can try to “fix” this problems, on my opinion, are: be yourself with those close to u, visit new places and try to be natural and funny with ppl who are around , make a new hobbies that involves to meet new persons and make some new ones, etc…

    Just be advice that the guy who is saying this to you (M, 28) is having their own battles to fight and have some depression isnt helping but.. at the end we are gonna die alone or with company. Just dont be focus on the outside, work on ur inner self. Hope this helps. :))

  31. Dude, let me tell you something, i recommend you stay away from dating apps. I think I understand what the issue is, you definitely want to talk to a woman on a daily basis and guess what, dating apps are going to take most of the time and aren’t the best to meet people because you are basically messing with a random stranger. If I were you, my advice is volunteering or joining a club and I’m sure there would be women there depending on which one you go to. That way, once you meet women, you are not only able to connect with them more but also begin to gain confidence to a point maybe asking a girl out. Idk, this is from experience so you can take an alternative route, not through social media.

    Edit: Other tips that people share are also relevant and beneficial like getting a hobby and that’s another way of valuing yourself more and boosting confidence. It’s also a good way of distracting yourself with negativity such as not getting matches. I recommend you learn to play a guitar(worth it) or do dance courses(I’m planning to do it during summer break) to also have fun and maybe you may meet a girl.

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