TLDR: Is he wanting a real relationship or looking for an easy hookup with stingy requests?
I met this guy off Hinge. The problem is… he won’t even drive down/meet half way to see me even though we are 30 minutes apart. He just finished residency school and has a nice Tesla. We have considered having brunch last week, but he said he will pay for our meal if I meet him at his location. With people I dated or let alone having a few dates, we have always met halfway if we were 15 miles away from each other.
On our first date, he suggested to drive over to place so he could carpool us to the hiking spot. I refused because I came from a place of trauma and I rather make smart decisions lol. So of course I told him I will drive there myself. After our hike, I think it was a good conversation we got going on. I was nervous, but I haven’t sensed anything yet because I never catch feelings on Day 1.
Evening rolls around, he offered to cook at his place. Again, I said no. “Why don’t we eat at a restaurant?” He was cool with it and proceeded to have dinner. We are still chatting and now he keeps bringing up movie and game night. I try to get this guy to meet halfway, but he isn’t following my request? He makes excuses he needs to be nearby home because he could be on call or an emergency would need him to be at the hospital.
Serious question, what are your thoughts? I think if a guy says they want a relationship and half assing on prompts in their bio…. Should I even believe they are looking for something serious? Lol
5 comments
He seems to be trying to get you to go to his place, rather than stay in public. It could be a red flag, or it could be money. If he’s in med school, he may not have enough to drive, and pay for a dinner or activity. Or he’s looking for the cheapest, quickest way to have sex with you.
He’s after the sex
If everything goes back to his place, that’s the one place to stay away from. He’s trying to hide it by wording it differently each time. They’re definitely red flags.
Even if he isn’t planning to murder you, what are his inflexibility and unwillingness to negotiate going to look like in a relationship when it comes down to making real decisions?
Has he mentioned he wants a serious relationship?
Either way, I think it’s apparent he has control issues and is clearly self-centred. I’d stay clear of someone like that.