^^ what was your (or someone else’s) story and any tips you can share?
thank you 🙏🏻
edit: context
i’ve met my current boyfriend of a little more than 1 year when we were both 12/13 when we were placed in the same class. it was love at first sight (and first crush) for me and i’ve always had feelings for him until we got together when we were 15, we dated for almost exactly a year, broke up due to a misunderstanding. i left the country for 2 years due to covid and we recently got back together several weeks ago but we’re going to be long distance due to college being in different continents.
tldr: people of reddit how do you make ldr’s work? what was your experience?
12 comments
Its too much work
It generally can’t work. There has to be a conscious effort to settle in the same location within a year, or it’s futile. Folks will come out with their anecdotes, and I’m delighted for them, but anecdotes aren’t evidence, except when they’re evidence of anecdotes. By aggregate, it’s a foolish task, unless as already stated swift plans are laid out to relocate together.
We kept in daily communication, back then it was Skype video calls at night. Visits whenever we could. She was a couple hours behind me in time zones, so I sacrificed a lot of sleep lol
Eventually she moved here to be with me, we married a year later, and 11 years later life is awesome.
We feel like that time apart forced us to get to know each other without getting distracted with sex and all that. We more than made up for it after moving in together.
Don’t bother. It’ll fall apart and just leave resentment over wasted time.
Hell I didn’t make commuting to work in a different city work so Im a sure as hell not going to bother attempting a long distance relationship.
Dont, LDR are a waste of time, stick to people in your zipcode.
As someone who was in a long distance relationship all I can say is that you’ll be happier if you don’t pursue this path. I know it’s cliche but there are plenty of fish in the sea. Don’t waste your youth being miserable in a long distance relationship. Meet new people, agree to maybe see each other again when you’re both no longer long distance. I dunno, remain friends if you have to but long distance honestly sucks. You’re better off living your life and experiencing new things, all long distance will do is make you bitter and sad. Very few people pull it off for a reason. Hope this helps.
You’re what 17-18 it’s likely not gunna work out regardless of distance.
Add college on top of it and it’s just gunna ruin whatever feelings could be there. Break up respectfully, have fun in college and if it’s meant to be after college you can reconnect.
Or just stay together but be sure you’ll both likely cheat. So either don’t ask about it or bring it up. But the most likely scenario is you will drift away starting with missing your daily text or weekly phone call. Then you’ll see he was out at a party.
Then it’s two months later and he seems off so you have a late night study session with that guy that just seems so sweet and def doesn’t wanna fuck.
Then the whole thing comes crashing down and you can’t even break up in person and resent the whole thing and love lost that even married people can’t hold together.
It can be the right person but the wrong time.
No matter what you do, the relationship will either work or not work.
Please for the love of everything good and nice in this world, talk as much as humanly possible. That’s the absolute best advice i could ever give to someone attempting a long distance relationship. And I wish you so much luck, when LDR’s work out, i honestly feel like it that much more rewarding than a regular relationship because of how hard they are.
The only LDR i have see actually work concisted of one of them (F) having relatively lower SMP than the other (M) and (M) having grown up in an absolutely Blue 💊 outlook. They are currently happy😊
The only close story that worked is my cousin and his gf. He worked in a different continent and she is kinda waiting for him here. The reason why it kinda worked is that they have a open relationship, not wed and I don’t think that they intend to.