Hi Everyone. This a long one so please stay with me.
I fell in love with someone a long time ago. We dated for almost four years. This person ended up emotionally cheating on me and so things ended.
Around eight months back, I reached out to this person, simply for closure on everything. I got something more from this.
So we were talking again. I was as guarded as I could be because this person hurt me so deeply. At first, things were alright. I began to let my guard down. I guess I fell back in love with them.
This person never made anything official for a few different reasons. They wanted to stay friends and keep me in their life while I was looking for something more.
I was able to see myself being with them for a long time, which I think hurt the most about this.
Things got to a point and I decided that I could not continue to be in this sort of relationship with someone who couldn’t make a decision on where we stand. They made me feel small and insignificant because they were not able to give me an answer. This was the hardest decision I probably have ever made, but I could not settle for a friendship with a person I saw my future with. So I let go.
As I let go, they kept me on all of their social medias. I originally was going to remove this person from seeing into my life, but decided against it. They also said they do not see what they did in the past as cheating. Them saying that was a deep wound simply because this was something that hurt me so bad to the point where I couldn’t be comfortable with anyone getting too close.
I tried so hard to be patient and understanding to it all, but the reality is, they hurt me again. And it’s my fault.
Somedays I feel hollow from everything. I sometimes want to just go back to the way things were, but I don’t think it is an option.
I deserve someone who can give me an answer and love me as much as I love them. But I don’t think I see someone giving me that kind of energy ever.
Should I give this time and reach out to them or should this be it? I really loved this person with all of my heart and had such a deep connection with them, but maybe I should keep moving. I’d like to think maybe when things get better for the two of us maybe, but I am not too sure.
Any and all advice would be so appreciated.
TLDR; I fell in love again with someone who cheated on me, and I got hurt again.
3 comments
That’s a wrap. You’re young and should be working on yourself, sleeping around if that’s your thing and career focused. If you can’t trust this person not to cheat, how could you trust them with potential children or your livelihood in the future?
Level up and don’t look back. Life is short. ✌️
Advice: move on. They have shown you in many ways that they do not hold you in high regard.
Listen to what people say, and do, and what they don’t say and don’t do.
in the future Don’t try to restart things that were already over once for a reason.
Keep your heart and your mind open as you move forward with life. You are young and have many years ahead of you.
Try your utmost not to bring the baggage that you carry from this fiasco into new relationships.
Be honest with yourself in who he is today and separate that from the person you fell in love with back them. How you said that you “fell back in love” I am wondering whether this is with the real him today or your memories of how things were back then in hoping that it goes back to that. It doesn’t seem like he treats you with much value nor respect today. Also the fact that he doesn’t see anything wrong with his past actions shows a lack of consideration for your feelings. I think it’s time to wrap it up, you deserve better.