Tonight I (27F) found a very small, cheap looking feminine ring in the condo I share with my partner (31M). We’ve been together 4 years. It only fits my pinkie it’s so small. I asked him about it and he said “oh, I don’t know. I found it a while ago but it don’t remember where.” I texted my friend who’s over a lot and asked if it was hers, it isn’t. I asked him again and he got a little red and said “are you accusing me of something?” and I said “kinda.” He didn’t really anything after that and left for a soccer game. Do I believe him? Keep pressing? Am I being crazy?
TLDR: I (27F) found a woman’s ring that isn’t mine in the condo i share with my partner (31M). He says he doesn’t know where it came from – do I believe him?
27 comments
I would be inclined to investigate further…
The main way to find out is to keep asking questions, It seems like you already have your answer though
I would do some investigating on his phone and social media. Rings don’t just appear.
Keep pressing. It was left there obviously for you to find. He wasn’t interested in easing your mind when he left. So now he has bought him some time to get his story straight. He didn’t think it was yours or your friends or he would have said something. Text the pic to your friend again. It could be a toe ring maybe.
That girl left it there for a reason…she either knows about you or possibly just recently found out. That is girl code at its finest and honestly I would run if I was you, especially after the way he reacted in not wanting to talk about it or “clear the air” about your concerns (which you have every right to have after finding something like that in your own home)
He has been seeing a side piece long enough that he feels comfortable enough to bring her to your condo to have sex. She is waiting for you two to break up so she can slide into your place. Accidentally leaving something of hers behind speeds up the process and doesn’t damage her relationship with your partner.
I find random things and jewelry in my house/car all the time. I tend to put things/trash in my pocket to throw away when I find a trash can and sometimes these knick knacks end up in the wash/laundry/floor/etc.
I’ve been accused of cheating because I had a random broken bracelet sitting in my center console for 2 years and never noticed it. I straight up just picked it up off the ground one time; no game plan in mind.
Don’t always jump to the worst conclusion.
If it’s a very tiny cheap looking ring I’d be less concerned really. Think about it.
Unless you’ve huge hands, this ring must be for a child or a very very petite woman. So a tiny woman was over having sex in your basement with your partner, and decided oh, ” I must take off this cheap little ring of mine before we proceed ”
Seems a bit ridiculous.
No comment…. The gerbil is trying to ask if it is your partners ring for his thing?
I would have said it belongs to Gollum.
I don’t know how long you’ve lived in that condo, but I’ve been in my apartment for 3 years and I still find random shit that previous tenants left behind sometimes. a shot glass seemed to magically appear in my dishwasher overnight the first few months. I don’t drink at all and had never seen it before.
Don’t let others make you do irrational things based on their own experiences.
Your actions update your life and not theirs
Maybe I’m in the minority here, but I don’t think I’d worry. If I found a cheap tiny ring in a crevice of my house, I’d probably assume it was from a past guest or their child. The only way it would make me suspicious is if it was somewhere really blatant (like the bathroom counter or nightstand) and I had been away and my husband was home alone.
Sounds like the kind of ‘jewelry’ you’d get in one of those 25¢ toy dispensers at the grocery store
So, you find a cheap child’s ring on a coffee table, immediately accuse him of cheating and you’re going to go through his devices? Really, that’s the first and most logical answer for you, cheating? What are you going to do when it turns out to be nothing? If I were him I’d be super pissed.
Look through his social media woman friends, look at their pics, see if they’re wearing the same ring
Breakup! Or dont.
I mean honestly, his story sounds legit. And he didn’t act weird until you kept pushing.
one time when I was folding laundry for my ex I found an earring in his dresser. I was pissed, texted him what Id found and he’d mentioned there hadn’t even been a girl over to his apartment that wasn’t me in years. both of his roommates were single (and virgins) and we were mid COVID. he texted his mom as a last resort, and she said she’d lost it 10+ years ago. she even showed me the matching earring.
anyways, I felt stupid for assuming. Id probably ask a couple friends. unless you find something more incriminating or in a more incriminating location, I’d probably just assume it’s a past renter or a guest that lost it. keep us updated tho
If my husband will find a random ring somewhere in the house he will just put it somewhere for me to find. Because he has no idea how many rings I have, how big/cheap/whatever they are. Probably he did the same.
Also once I found definitely not mine ring right in my bathroom, was confused trying to remember how I ended with such poorly made piece of shit, good only for a kid. But than I remembered that I bought a wig for a party, and they put it as present. I left it there to throw away later, but forgot about it.
Is strange to me that you are so quick to blame.
UpdateMe!
I can’t count how many rings I found in my life, ranging from kid’s cheap plastic ring to full diamonds ring, I also found airpods last week. Chances are that it’s some kid/teenager’s cheap ring that he picked up on the street thinking it may have some value.
You found the ring in the basement so, assuming this comes from a mistress, either:
– the mistress went to the basement and removed her ring there for obscure reasons.
– she dropped her ring somewhere else in the house, your partner found it and decided it was a good idea to put it on a table in the basement rather than hiding it or giving it back.
To me it sounds much more probable that he picked it up somewhere.
Women usually leave behind small things like hair ties, or in this case a small cheap ring, when they find out that they guy they hooked up with, has a girlfriend or wife. So to give you a sign, they leave behind obviously female things. You should leave him.
Idk if he’s cheating, honestly. You’d think he’d be more careful if he is.
I mean, I have picked up silly baubles when I’m on a walk.
Sometimes we can come across something ‘different’ and pick ’em up. I would just put it in my ‘junk drawer’ and forget all about it until my husband or son would be like, ‘What’s this?’
So maybe this is what happened also? It depends on your relationship and how much you trust him.
When have you been gone long enough he would have felt comfortable to just have some fling over?
Is there any other reason to be suspicious.
Check his phone.
And fact the ring is so tiny . Sounds of a child’s.
I doubt any guy would take a ring as a token after a hookup out of the house and let alone bring it home to put in the basement drawer ..
Did anyone live in your condo before you or was it a new build? I have found earrings and rings in our house, they were cheap and small as well. I am 100% sure they belonged to the little girl that lived in our house before us. It’s best not to jump to conclusions. Have there been other signs of cheating?? If there is other evidence to support your SO cheating, then perhaps it could be something. But if there has never been any sign of cheating before you found the ring, there is most likely an innocent explanation for it.
Was it possibly not a ring? Like a piece to one of his tools or his car or something? Very stereotypical I know but something to think about.
You say cheap so was it plastic? very well could be packaging from something that he just forgot to clean up