I (26m) drive to various addresses to work and we are assigned partners. Most of these complaints that you hear about is usually office work where you’re in a cubicle. Well I’m in a car with this person (30m) most of the day. And I can’t really put on headphones and escape them.
I am by nature a quiet person. I speak when it’s necessary and answer questions honestly. This person will say whatever is on the front of their mind and even repeat it a second time if he feels like it. He makes childish jokes, sexual or racist things, or even just spurts out about his sex life if he feels like it. He also will make shit up and is a compulsive liar. I’ve caught him in quite a few lies.
When he isn’t talking to me the whole drive he will randomly call his wife and speak to her which gives me a mental break. Sometimes he will call his friends and laugh about stuff. They rarely get a word in, I know this because he has it on speaker phone. A few times here and there they will hang up on him and he will realize a minute later that they hung up. And just continue the conversation with me.
When he does asks me questions like “What’s your opinion?” I will go to answer and then he immediately cuts me off with either his opinion or a completely different topic entirely. On top of all this, he constantly reminds me how charming he is and how he is a smooth talker and women love him.
When I confronted my manager they made an announcement to make sure we all try to work and keep conversations appropriate. When I got in the car with him he said talked about how that was weird and just kept talking, like nothing happened. We cannot switch partners as of right now because that affects scheduling and trust me I’ve tried.
I am at my wits end, this job pays well but Idk how to exactly approach this. I know he probably has adhd and is most certainly a narcissist. Do I just tell him to stfu? Do I tell him how I feel even if I could get a word in? Do I just rip his throat out? Please help
tl;dr Coworker I am forced to be in car with all day won’t stop talking
5 comments
Go back to your manager and tell them you cannot work with someone who spouts sexist and racist drivel constantly.
> Do I just tell him to stfu?
Yes. Don’t bother with explanation, how you feel, etc.
“Hey, man, give it a rest, already. You talk constantly, about crap I don’t care about, and I’ve had enough.”
Do you always do the driving?
Yes tell him to stfu. So annoying when people will not get the hint that you don’t fucking care about their story.
Sounds like he has a messed up amygdala. I can imagine your frustration. Take care of yourself, that is first priority. His throat belongs to him. Don’t rip it out lol. There’s many possible responses to this, some will work sometimes. Keep in mind this guy could get promoted tomorrow and be your boss. Happens every day. Could you let this roll off your back? In the world of work, this is not the worst behavior you’ll have to deal with believe it or not.
Make him meet you everywhere you have to be.