How do you initiate sex?

5 comments

1. Often it just happens but then sometimes hints or even dirty pics/text help

2. Hey we should f*ck usually works for me .

3. Kisses and cuddles. When my hands are next to his parts, I ask him if that’s okay if I go down there. I find it very natural, I’m very affectionate for my partner!

4. Touch.

   Obviously the level of acceptable touch is small when with a stranger, so do not do this to someone you are unfamiliar with.

   If a person wants to be touched, they will move closer to you. When they are close enough to be touched, begin in a non erogenous area, like the upper back or the hand. Avoid touching the shoulder first, as this can sometimes signal wanting to “control the body.”.

   A positive response would be returning touch, squeezing your hand for example. A relaxed sigh is often another common response, or turning the head upward or the lower back outward.

   Remember, responding positively to touch does not mean the person wants to go as far as having sex. You need some more direct confirmation for that to happen.

   If the person withdraws or shrinks from touch, do not go further, ask if something is wrong and apologize if they are uncomfortable.

   Respecting boundaries is important, most people want to feel safe with a person before engaging with them physically, and the level of safety and comfort is different for each person.

   Some people also simply don’t know how they feel, if a person is wavering or conflicted about sex, don’t push, you don’t know what kind of hornets nest you might be kicking (trauma, personality issues, attachment issues, virginity, anxiety, etc.) These might require long term conversation and greater familiarity before that person can relax enough to have a pleasurable experience and not associate you with a past negative experience.

   Usually kissing and a positive verbal response to a question like “do you like this?” is enough to progress further into foreplay, but I’m not going to go into all of the different foreplay methods.

   So TLDR. Touch, gradually progressing to more erogenous areas after verbal confirmation.

   Also, have some idea in your mind of who this person is and be careful with them, don’t ever treat someone like an object, people have feelings and its best to know them before arousing them.

5. Grab them by the pussy