So I am mid-30s, young kids and all my gatherings it is normal for parents to have a casual drink or two while we hang out and the kids play.
When I was growing up, my parents friends were never ever drinking at gatherings. I’d they did, my parents were we worried that they were not going to keep a close enough eye on us or were alcoholics.
Is drinking for parents becoming more acceptable, or we’re my parents just puritanical? Is spending time as a family more important to my generation so we casually drink around the kids rather than meeting at a bar?
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I’m mid 30s and my parent always drank when we were around. Neighborhood get togethers at the neighborhood pool always had patent’s drinking and kids swimming lol. I’m surprised none of us drown to be honest. We’d go with some other families to our lakehouse and everyone was drinking. It was super common, probably more so now.
My parents and their friends were always drinking – not to the point of getting drunk – but definitely always had a couple. Even the parents who didn’t drink always seemed to have beers or some wine for the people who did.
We could not have had more opposite experiences lol
Your parents were the odd ones out. Mine were too when I was a kid. But it was very common at social functions for alcohol to be available for the adults. Summers out using the grill, church functions, etc…
Not a parent, but a millennial:
My dad is a sober alcoholic, he hasn’t had anything to drink since I was young. There wasn’t alcohol in our house growing up. But outside of that, it was absolutely common for parents of friends to have a drink or two while the kids were hanging out.
My dad stopped drinking when I was very young but it was very common for my mom and other parents to have some drinks at a get-together.
I’m in my early 30s and my parents were always having a few drinks at events like these. I grew up in southwest CT in case that matters.
My whole extended family on both sides drank around kids at family gatherings and stuff. I don’t really remember if any of my friends parents would drink… if they did it wasn’t to excess/wasn’t something my clueless little self would notice. Then again I didn’t usually notice drinking among my family either; I come from a long line of heavy drinkers and alcoholics but none of them were really “bad” drunks if that makes sense, like they just got loud/sloppy/friendly, but we never had any fights or blowups or violence.
I’m a millennial parent, usually there is no drinking in the house until the kid is asleep, and even then it’s pretty light. I only have one other parent friend and they drink like twice a year. Thus ends my survey of millennial parenting styles.
The adults around me drank a lot of alcohol growing up
Imo/based on my experience this may have been a “your parents/your parents friends” thing.
Growing up at get together adults would have a drink or two (and maybe the occasional adult would have a couple more lol). It wasn’t unusual at all.
I don’t thonk it’s unusual or unacceptable to have a beer or two while the kids play.
How the hell do you get through children’s gatherings sober? I’m not a big drinker but man I gotta be liquored up to put up with those little monsters
I think so. The idea of bringing your kids to a brewery is such a weird thing to me.
Like a brewery is just a classier more “daytime” bar, but it’s still a bar. If my parents ever went out and did stuff, they’d leave me with a sitter or whatnot.
Maybe it’s just my state (or maybe not) but literally everything here involves drinking.
I think millenial children were brought up in the MADD era where we went from drinking being accepted and even drunk driving being somewhat permissible to alcohol being a direct danger to children everywhere.
I know my parents almost never drank around me. My dad might have a beer if we were barbecuing at home or a single cocktail if we were out, but he never drove afterwards and was never at any point in my childhood visibly inebriated.
Lol. Having a few drinks is what makes my family tolerable. There has never been a “dry event” I can ever recall. My parents grew up in the 70s and they said everyone was shitfaced in those times.
Maybe just your family? My parents and their friends drank at just about every event ever
My wife will have a drink or two while the kids are around. I never do; but I drink plenty after the kids go to bed. I don’t know, I just don’t want to set a bad example for my kids.
I don’t think it is the end of the world to drink a little in front of them, I just choose not to.
Your parents were definitely the odd ones out.
Casual drinking is far less acceptable today than it once was. Heck, just watch an episode of Mad Men. Yeah, it’s a fictitious TV show but people really did drink at work like that.
I am mid 30’s and it was quite common when I was growing up.
Now, most of the kids events I go to with my two are for the gaggle of cousins they have on their mom’s side, the majority of whom don’t drink so I almost never see it.
This is really more about your social circle than a difference over time.
Your parents were puritanical.
I’m 50 and I remember when I was a kid in the 1970s multiple times when my family had left visiting friends that we had to pull off to the side of the road so my parents could swap who was driving because my dad was too drunk to drive. And this was only a few miles drive.
Also, since I’m solid GenX I’ll relate my and my friends’ attitude. We often get pretty hammered at get togethers as long as we have a sober driver. Now most of our kids are 16+ so we can rely on them to drive if we’ve had too much.
My parents used to get trashed while my friends and I played around on our street. Never really got why my mom was on the toilet throwing up until recently lmao
35 and my dad used to have keggers.
I think there is a culture change here in that alcohol is seen as a social thing rather than a hard party only thing. Thinking of how wineries and breweries have exploded in popularity in my lifetime people go to these places to talk and enjoy craft beers not to get blitzed.
I’d also say it depends on the age of the kids. if these are newborns and toddlers we’re talking about then yeah there needs to be at least 1 responsible adult. I think once they hit like 10 or older you can probably let loose a little.
Your parents sound kind of unpleasant and judgmental.
I was just talking to my husband about this (mid and late millennials. The prevalence and availability of alcohol has never been greater. You’re able to rent a keg from a craft brewery, and when our parents were raising us, that was never a thing. And now, it’s acceptable to take your kids to a brewery.
My parents also never drank around me because they wanted to set a good example. So I’d agree with you – drinking is definitely becoming more casual, especially at family functions.
Drinking at gatherings with kids around isn’t a big deal. I wasn’t even aware of how shit faced the adults were getting when I was little.
The biggest worry is that when those kids start getting into Middle School you need to start looking that shit up. An open wet bar in the home is trouble for teenagers.
I’m in my 40s and I feel like casual drinking is becoming less common, not more. When I was a kid it was expected that alcohol would be served and consumed at basically every gathering no matter what, even children’s birthday parties and such. These days that is much less likely to be the case.