I have repeatedly found myself in a situation like this with someone who is either a near stranger, like a classmate at the beginning of the semester, an acquaintance, or someone I’d befriended within the past year or so. Majority of times it is men (I am female). I used to think maybe I was the problem but I eventually realized a lot of these men are somewhat toxic themselves. Is it insecurity or them knowing they’re actually not good people and can’t be trusted? Are they just… entitled?
Are people usually reactive/offended when you, say, decline a gift, or don’t offer/follow them on social media when they ask? Or when you give them a simple “no”? Even if I approach it nicely, or am very obviously uncomfortable, it still happens a lot. ☹️
Edit: Reactive, not reactionary
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It’s not okay for people to respond this way when you politely decline.
In my experience it’s men who respond like this more than women, and it’s an abusive tactic.
Why do I call this out as abusive language? First, the angry/frustrated attitude on their part is an unsuitable response to situation. Second, and more pointedly, what are they trying to achieve with such a stance? Intimidation, putting you on the defensive, trying to make you feel guilty?
Some people might reason that it’s not abuse if you weren’t physically assaulted, but that is a problematic perspective given just how many of these sorts of reactionary/offended responses many of us have dealt with nearly every single day of our lives.
Trust takes observation and time. Given your caution about these social interactions, you’re correct to trust your intuition.
If they’re acting this way toward a new acquaintance, what would it be like to be in a real argument with them?