Just curious

44 comments

  1. As long as you feel is right. Some people date for years before proposal and don’t last long in marriage. Some propose quick and are married for life. There’s no one answer or formula

  2. Doesn’t matter. It is a lottery, hit or miss. I would suggest try it out and live together. Walk away, if it doesn’t work.

  5. There is no “how long”

    In fact, by the time a proposal happens it shouldn’t really be a surprise to your partner.

    Reasonable people in an adult relationship should be able to have conversations about intent/marriage and know where their relationship is and where it is headed. The only surprise should be the timing of the question.

  7. I think several months of living together should show you how you two handle daily tasks and your sexual compatibility. And no amount would prepare you to challenges like having kids, buying property, moving to other city/country, aging. So I don’t get why some people wait longer than that.

    Well that’s assuming you have been adult people and your 5 years of relationship did not start at 15.

  9. We were both mature adults, we wanted the same things. She already had a daughter so she didn’t want to play games and we talked through a lot of issues like mature adults. I proposed 8 months from the first date. And still married 20 years later.

  10. For me it was around 14 months been together for 11 yrs now.
    If your at that stage of your life where you want/ ready to settle down then you won’t need to be in the relationship long at all. Making future plans together is a good sign. When you know you know if you have doubt then you won’t want to waste your time.
    Nothing is ever perfect and its not always easy but marriage is a commitment. Honesty and communication are vital

  11. As long as it feels right to both. NEVER propose if you don’t know what the answer will be. It should have been discussed way before a ring is bought. Actual length of time doesn’t matter. For my wife and I, from first kiss to marriage was just over a year, and we were living together for a majority of that time. It will be 30 years in September.

  13. Everyone says there’s no number. Just when you know you’re ready.

    Ok. You have 18 years old certain they’re ready after 3 weeks. So… marry the girl?

    In reality, my rule of thumb is date the girl at least a year, move in together, live together at least a year, then start thinking about proposing.

    That gives you a year of being partially apart, a year seeing how she is naturally at home, then 1-2 years of engagement to change your mind.

  14. In my opinion a few years bc less will be ‘new relationship energy’ but arranged marriages are most successful and have 0 days of relationship prior so ymmv

  15. Took my best mate recently about a month

    That’s not even the fastest for him

  16. I was dating my wife for about 9 months before I proposed. This summer will be 11 years.

  20. So you brain will give you a window of 1 to 3 years of that love obsession. It’s called limerence. Make sure all the little things you can deal with. Because that slightly annoying thing that may seem cute now can be come agitating once limerence has worm off.

  22. My parents got married within 6 months, still married 35 years later. Nowday’s just don’t get married unless you’re together for years.

  23. At least a year, because often times people mask the first 6-9 months of a relationship or you’re in the honeymoon phase.

  25. at least two years, probably longer. Definitely already living together.

  27. Depends on the couple, I guess. Also the times. My grandpa proposed after dating my grandma for 2 weeks and they were married for over 50 years. Although, that definitely wouldn’t happen now. You’d get laughed at and they’d think you were crazy. A few years minimum.

  29. It really depends on what the relationship is and how close the couple is.

    Honestly, I’d say no less than one year. If the couple does like the idea of marriage, I’d say 3 to 5 years sounds good. If they don’t, just don’t worry

  30. My parents got engaged after 4 months and married 5 months later. My best friends got engaged after 4 years and married 10 years later.

    My parents are celebrating their 50th anniversary today. My friends have been married for 10 years.

    It is an entirely personal decision to be discussed within a relationship.

  31. We got engaged around 2 years of officially dating, but we moved in together when we got together, and I think that’s an important factor. We dated casually before we fully got together, as I was in an open relationship prior.

  32. Atleast 2 years, scientifically sleaking the chemicals that give that new love feeling wear off by then and if your still happy and compatible do it

  33. There’s no right or wrong, I personally would wait at least a year, but that’s just me, don’t feel obligated to do what I do.

  34. I’d marry the right person at 6 months for sure. But I’d also have a healthy amount of willingness to see it ultimately fail. I think you “know” early on, but compatibility comes with time. Could go either way! I think it’s romantic to do something reckless in the name of love.

  35. However long it takes for you to really know eachother, and it helps if you have actually lived together

  36. Well, as long as it takes.

    Young guys, unfortunately, tend to think with their smaller heads when it comes to women.

    When I was in the Navy I had to deal with youngsters coming into work after a long weekend and telling everyone that he had found the love of his life.

    Oddly to the woman (often substantially older, and a former military spouse) who took his V-Card.

    Edit: I just remembered one kid who was putting in a request to get married (he had to submit the request due to his security clearance. To maintain the clearance she needed to be checked out) and I read over his request chit noting that he hadn’t put down the Love of His Life’s name.

    He didn’t know her name. He just called her ‘babe.’ And he wanted to marry her.

    Once he found out, it turned out I knew her. She’d married a buddy of mine 12 years earlier. The kid was unaware that she had three kids, and got mad at me for making such an absurd claim.

    I didn’t laugh at him when he came in to confirm she did, indeed have 3 kids. I didn’t.

    I would suggest that a weekend, even a long weekend, is too short of a time. Fifty years might be a tad long.

  37. As long as it takes for you to come to the conclusion that you and your significant other would forever **both** be better off together than apart.

  39. The time it takes to fall in love for a second time

    The time it takes to have overcome a fight and only become stronger for it

    The time it takes to see how you, your partner, and your relationship grow

    The time it takes to know the answer

  40. This question doesn’t have a one-size fits all answer.

    My dad knew the moment he met me mom that he would marry her. They were engaged by six months and married within a year. This was in 1978 – they’ll be celebrating their 44th anniversary in September.

    My sister and her husband were together for four years before he proposed, and another year and a half before they got married.

    It’s unlikely their marriage will last much longer.

    Every couple is different.

  41. When you think you both know everything about each other’s story and want to start a new one with them. How little or much time that may take is different for everyone.

  43. I proposed after 3 weeks of dating, celebrating 27 years of marriage next month. When you know, you know!

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