Need advice as not sure what to do anymore and it’s driving me insane (sorry it’s long)

TL;DR – Bf at a “celebrity’s” home he knew I wasn’t happy about. Broken promises.
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Morning all.

This is a throw away. I’m going to try to make this as short as possible.

My Bf (27m) & I (30f) have been together for a few years but we don’t live together.

There has been a lot of upset in our relationship over the past year with how he treats me, how his lack of communication and love- and even just ignoring my feelings in general telling me “it’s not that deep” have caused me to really go within myself.

When meeting him I thought I found the man of my dreams. We had the same views, wants and outlook.

However over the past year I’m struggling. I love this man so much but I feel like there’s no respect, my feelings are never heard and if they are I’m “over reacting”

My bf has a job but occasionally helps out someone who works in celebrity homes. This isn’t his job. He helps when needed. But he has gone to some pretty cool celeb homes over the years.

A few months ago he told me he may be going to a certain home to work – this “celeb” let’s call her Sarah; has been known for her promiscuous ways. Parading around in lingerie, numerous “affairs” IG of her laughing about how hot gardener is, and generally not a person by how she’s portrayed on IG and papers etc I’d want to hang around.

I told my bf that i really don’t like the thought of him working at that place, we discussed it – argued… I felt so strong about it that he said to me “I promise you if you feel like that I won’t do it”

I was relieved. He finally listened to how I felt. Tuesday he woke up work and text me – now usually he tells me where he is going, when home, what the job is – general conversation – I wish him a good day etc – Tuesday I got nothing, asked him where he was working and got nothing. Never heard from him till he “finished work” when he told me “hard job I was at that Sarah’s”

So after promising me he wouldn’t go he then kept it from me till after . He tried to say she wasn’t there it was a abandoned house – I went on IG and found that she was Infact at the house .

The fact he promised me then completely went against that and how I feel makes me sick to my stomach.

I feel it just proves to me he doesn’t care about how I feel and if he says “sorry I love you” it makes it all better

I’m sick of not being thought of I’m sick of crying. I basically told him I don’t trust him anymore and I see it as he hid it from me and he lied to me aswell as breaking his promise. (obviously he doesn’t see it this way- he said I told you when I finished ) I have told him I couldn’t go on with the relationship like this.

On knowing how I felt that night – he woke up the next morning to go there again today. Off his own back(again this isn’t his job)

I know people will see this as a huge over reaction but with everything going on , how up and down my relationship is lately, the promises to stop hurting me and now this.

I really feel hurt.
I feel like I’d never do this to someone I loved. It sucks so much. He doesn’t see anything wrong with his actions.

UPDATE- I told him I couldn’t carry on this way and that he has really hurt me. He promised me a few weeks ago he wouldn’t ever hurt me again but here we are. He told me I’m wrong about it all and “it’s not like I think” today is Thursday and I haven’t heard anything from him basically for a few days other then him saying “I’m having the worst day ever”

No fight. No trying to make it right. No nothing. I’m fighting off the will to message him because I do love him. He is a good man. I’m just sick of being hurt. The thought of him being upset that’s I’ve had a go about this makes me want to apologise to him. But I know I shouldn’t