Hello. I have neutral relation with my mother but I will live in her house for 3 month omg.
I know best solution would be to find good job out off town but I didnt achieve it yet. So Ill live with her to save money… I think it is perfect excuse to treat me bad. Well she isn’t always bad she is smart we have a lot in common but \*\*TL;DR;\*\* when something makes her angry she is totally different person…
thats so strange. I tried to tell her that she hurts me by yelling at me. But in reverse I always get that I hurt her by no cleaning house, no cooking food etc. Well…. I know I am not perfect but often I was trying to help her with that the problem is that she notice little something that I haven’t done and she become tyrant. I dont think so that If I haven’t done something allow her to yell at me even when I know I was suppose to do it because 1) I didn’t for example clean not to hurt her and 2) when she yell at me she is hurting me intentionaly. Also I dont feel much power to help her when I am scared of here, when I was living with my sis I was helping her alot because she respected me. Okey that the problem.
Is there any solution except leave the situation? I know that some people can’t be change… but when I talk with her about it she can respect it for even a week sometimes so maybe we can cooperate somehowe. I think she has just strong temperament and I am very sensitive persone, when she yell at me she is happy in next hour like nothing happen but I cannot leave my bed the whole day because of pain.
I tried to ignore her attack but she gets even more angry because it triggers her.
I tried yell ath her too but she is sooo much stronger then I, wwll sometimes she stopped when I showed her how it hurts bu using same method on her so I think it better then ignoring. But I cannot do it I feel it so fake to react like that and I feel so bad after yelling at her.
Is there third option?
2 comments
Try to set boundaries and limits since the beginning.
I wanted to say ignore her but if it upsets her, will not be easy. But you can still try to avoid her maximum and go just in the house to sleep.
Otherwise try to leave as soon as possible.
Good luck
Sounds like my mother, look she is the way she is you have to try to accept it and talk to her and try not to take it so personal
You have to weight up the good Vs bad about moving home, it will never be easy and look it’s only 3 months, try to respect her by doing what you need to do so she doesn’t blow up
You know your mother is super sensitive too right, she sees things not being done as disrespectful towards her and she is so sensitive to it she gets angry
Try not to take it personal she’s just having a tantrum