How am I supposed to tell my boyfriend that he’s making me feel like i’m not enough?

Obligatory warning – mobile user, sorry about problems with layout etc…

I don’t know if i’d describe it like *not enough* but I don’t know how else to word it.

My (17F) boyfriend (19M) have been dating for 8 months and everything’s been fine until recently.
I have a low self esteem and like a lot of reassurance which he knew before dating me and he told me that if i felt like there was anything or i didn’t feel loved or something to just let him know.
I have been trying whenever i need reassurance that he still loves me i used to say ‘do you still love me’ and ‘are you still happy with me’ which really bothered him and he kept asking me if i had no faith in him/the relationship and i’d explain it to him.
since it bothered him i stopped doing that and just started telling him how i felt about him so he could then tell me in return, i thought this was better because i got to hear what i needed and also got to tell him how i felt, however he caught on and said it made him feel bad.
a few months ago he told me that i didn’t show that i loved him which i was upset about because i didn’t want him to feel like that.
so ever since:
i’ve been cuddly with him,
told him that i loved being with him and i loved seeing him and things i loved about him,
i’d buy him things like nothing big just things that’d make his life easier or to make him happy like a soap dispenser he saw and liked and things like that,
or i did stuff for him to make his life easier and make him happy like i painted a few walls in his flat that he was really dreading
because i thought in this way it was showing i loved him like he wanted me to.
but ever since i was actively putting all this effort in it feels like he’s been pulling away.
all the things he used to do to show he loved me he just doesn’t do anymore and little things like whenever we’re together he’s not really with me like he’ll be on the other side of the bed and play on his phone and he kinda treats cuddling me like a chore and he used to text me whenever he went out with his friends
I don’t mind whenever he goes out i just like to know.
or whenever i wanted to talk about my feelings he always used to reply so quickly and care about what i was saying.
Recently, he asked me if i was only buying him things because i was trying to make it so he wouldn’t leave me. this was literally in the middle of a shop and i was confused and kinda hurt because this hadn’t come up before so idk where it came from.
i was upset about it but i decided to drop it until i’d calmed down a bit so a couple of days later i asked him about it again and he said that it was just the way he was raised that the gentlemen should pay
i said i understood and i’d pay less if he wanted me to but that i still wanted to do nice things with him and get nice things so i still wanted to pay a bit and also because it’s part of how i was showing that i care about him and he said it was fine and i didn’t have to stop paying it just made him feel bad.
i told him when he asked if it was only bc i was scared he was going to leave me it made me feel that i only came across like an insecure needy girlfriend and i didn’t like that
he opened my snap and left me on opened for an hour
and then his snap maps said he was a mile from where he lives in a block of flats
so when he finally replied i just asked him completely bluntly and he said he didn’t know and was at home the whole time and that snapchat must have glitched out.
But it was that he left me on opened after i was taking about my feelings like he’s asked me to before in the past.
and recently he’s just been leaving my messages on delivered for hours before replying.
i dont know how to tell him how i feel without it feeling like it’s an attack on him.

TLDR : i feel like i’m always changing and putting in effort to make my boyfriend happy and he’s not putting in the same effort and then just finding problems with how i’m showing i care. i don’t know how to tell him this without coming across rude.