Women don’t care about looks like men do or just be confident and funny or go to the gym. Yes men care more but that doesn’t change the fact that women still need to be physically attracted to their partner and majority of women will go for looks first same with men. Conventionally unattractive men can’t force attraction and going to the gym won’t do much because there’s no gym for face which is the most important aspect of attraction to most people.
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An attractive face alone is not enough, as Tinder shows most women desire a male with a decent physique. Also, you may have a lot of fat on your face, so doing some cardio will get rid of that.
Preferences are changing and not everyone has caught on. Women don’t need men to survive in society anymore
When a woman is choosing a partner, it isn’t because of his looks that she chooses him.
Of course saying looks don’t matter is completely a false statement, because to even be considered in the “choice” that I mentioned before, you have to meet a minimum list of requirements which quite commonly includes looks.
Don’t let that stop you, I’ve seen very ugly dudes with very attractive women because they offered something that she couldn’t ignore.
As far as face goes, that’s mostly related to diet and body fat percentage. If you’re in the gym but you continue to eat too much salt and sugar, your face will hold water. Also supplementing your diet with herbs and vegetables (asparagus is quite common) that are diuretic will help shed water weight around the face.
There’s a lot of societal lies in this post. First off there have been numerous studies as well as online dating data that show that women find 80% of men unattractive. Women on dating apps which are looks centric swipe right 14% of the time compared to 46% for men. That’s a difference of over 300%
As far as the gym not making you look better, there are several actors like Gerard Butler & Chris Hemsworth that you can look at to unequivocally prove that statement false. [John Sonmez](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Uua5FJirQ8w/maxresdefault.jpg) of bulldog mindset is probably one of the most extreme transformations I’ve seen in the past few years.
Also, there’s no gym for your height. If you’re short like I am, it’s over for you.
I have a list of things I look for in a guy and traditional attractiveness is not on the list. Maybe you are trying to get with the wrong types of women or maybe you’re an asshole to women and you don’t realize it.
Then get reconstructive face surgery.
Broo, “gym wont do so much” realy? you will proly get jaw line bcs of loosing fat, if you are above 5 10 you won a lottery and go get some nice haircut and get some tan from sun + skincare if you have trouble with skin. You will be 8/10 if you do all of these steps.
Word salad.
Jesus.
It’s definitely not true for me. To me you have to be confident. I could care less what you look like, the cockier the better lol. But obviously don’t be an asshole.
I mean, going to the gym will always make you look better. And the lower you me bf%, the better and more defined your face will look.
TL;DR, stop whining and lift.
I believe there are more women *open* to dating guys who are unattractive but successful.
For example, Hugh Hefner was 86 years old when he married Crytal Harris who was 26 years old and a former centerfold model for Playboy Magazine.
Odds are you’re not going to find many *if any* 26-year-old guys willing to marry an 86-year-old woman no matter how rich or famous she is.
Secondly, just go to any public place and you’re bound to see more average/unattractive guys with women who are a cut above in the looks department by comparison.
Rarely do you see a situation where *the guy looks better* than his girlfriend/wife.
Having said that, everyone naturally wants to be with someone they are attracted to.
Nevertheless, there is evidence some women are willing to *date against type* to find happiness.
Author Lori Gotlieb had a bestseller with “Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough”
The book espouses it might be best for some women to let go of *the fairytale* of marrying “Prince Charming” or the “Dashing Knight” in shining armor and find a man who treats them right.
My guess is a book written for men to do the same wouldn’t sell very many copies. 😂
Even the loner awkward geek fantasizes about dating model type women instead of pursuing the female version of himself. He’s depressed not because *he can’t get a girl*, it’s because *he can’t get “the kind” of girl he wants*. (He doesn’t want to pick from the low hanging fruit.)
***”I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.”*** – Groucho Marx
***”Go where you are celebrated, not tolerated. If they can’t see the real value of you, it’s time for a new start.”*** – Unknown
***”Happiness isn’t getting what you want, it’s wanting what you got.”*** – Garth Brooks
Best wishes!
Attraction is subjective though. So while one woman may not be attracted to a particular guy, the next woman might be. There is no blanket “hey this guy is attractive to all women and this other guy isnt”. Also, you can’t say “the majority of” when that isn’t at all true. Everyone is an individual and like I already said, what one woman finds attractive, the next may not. Also, looks only go so far. Personally, I don’t care if a guy looks like a Greek God, if his personality is shit, he’s unattractive and I won’t give him the time of day.
women care more about looks like a other user stated gym will help 100% no matter how short or fucked up your face it wont make you a model but it will help and as a ugly guy anything you can have extra is good
> Conventionally unattractive men can’t force attraction and going to the gym won’t do much because there’s no gym for face which is the most important aspect of attraction to most people.
Why do you even concern yourself so much with improving the attractiveness of unattractive people? There are equal numbers of unattractive men and women. Let them build couples like they always have. Unless the unattractive women rather stay single than mating with their equal, i see no problem on the population level.
Because it really isn’t all about looks. The first guy that I fell head over heels in love with was unlike any guy I had “dated” before. He wasn’t the type I would normally go for, and he is certainly not conventionally attractive. I got a lot of comments from other friends about “how I could do better” when he broke my heart, but lo and behold, I was in love with him and found him super hot for years afterward. (No longer in love with him anymore, but still find him attractive and thats because if who he is, not conventional looks).
After that experience, that really changed my perspective of men when I continued to use dating apps. It made me take a closer look at profiles. It can certainly be hard when you have to base it off of a profile and strictly for looks, but I have certainly learned that sometimes it is worth giving a guy a chance even if he isn’t mind-blowingly hot off the bat. Since then, there have been a handful of times where I found a man attractive after I got to know him when he maybe wasn’t considered conventionally attractive.
Think of it this way, you’re first priority should be to focus on yourself and be happy with yourself, when you’re going on dates, find someone you bound with and get along with, even if you don’t date you’ll always have one more person in your life that you get along with. And would you want to date someone that chose you just because of hope you look or how successful you are? Looks change, and money doesn’t buy attraction, it just the money and successfulness attracting them, not you.
Im generally on the more attractive side, I’m clean, 6ft, caring, my friends are happy I’m in their life and I help people however I can, but none of that has kept a partner in my life. I’ve had partners leave me for people that are 5’5”-5’10” and are a bit heavier than me, and the reason they did was cause they were a better match for each other.
All those external factors only remove or lessen the barriers to finding/keeping someone. But if those external factors are the only reason that person is there, then that’s not a relationship I would want.
Important thing is to find people that you can be yourself with, cause once you find someone that loves you for you, they don’t really give two shits about how you look. And a lot of them will see you as being attractive, love does that.
If you are going to the gym because you want to attract women, then you will have a hard time. If you go the gym because you want this for yourself, to be fitter, stronger and have some ventilation to loose steam,then there is a higher chance to attract women. There is a different motivation aspect. And believe me if u do this for girls and fine some, when u stop sometime after she will leave u. Because u pretended to be someone
Nobody is saying this.
You go to the gym to improve yourself. If yoi do it to get a girl you’ll be a guy that is wasting money on gym membership.
You probably reek of desperation in real life as much as your post here does.
Take care of yourself. That means the gym and watching what you eat for your body. Work at developing your conversational skills. Develop your mind through reading or educational classes. If the woman you want isn’t there now, imagine what life you want her to walk into, and start building that.
Personally, dating apps suck. They are a literal hell for almost everyone involved. Women will only visually cue on a very small number of men. Men can go weeks, send out hundreds of attempts, and only, maybe, get one result. Meanwhile, women are bombarded with options the second they complete their account.
I could talk more about how rotten modern society is, but I won’t here.
There’s a difference between being unattractive and being ugly.
It’s not uncommon to see beautiful women with ugly men. Evidently you don’t need to be good looking to get women because they don’t value looks more than other things.
Confidence, attitude, and competence are far more important to women than looks.
But different people have different types. And in real life sexual attraction is looks + your personality + how well you connect with the other person.
Most women enjoy men being a bit stronger and bigger than them, so going to the gym is a good idea.
People like different faces. And a face is just as much about their facial expressions and the vibe you pick up on than someone’s cranium.
Like someone else said, women find 80% of men unattractive in online dating. That’s because we don’t see the personality behind it.
I’ve dated a 5 guys and I think I would only find 1 of them attractive if I didnt know them and saw them on a picture or something. Only one of them was really conventionally attractive.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t find them attractive after we talked. That’s why I dated them.
Physical attraction is super important to me. But someone could be not conventionally attractive, but be attractive to me and other women because of their personality.
I also find some guys that are on those reality shows for example, very conventionally attractive. Big muscles, nice face, etc. But because of their personality I would never ever date them. I would also describe people that look like them as, not my type, because I think their personality is shit.
So you might not be super attractive, and if you’re really ugly you’re gonna have a much harder time, but if you’re social, outgoing, confident, can hold a conversation, nice, etc. women are also going to think you’re physically more attractive.
I’ve seen more often than not where a guy is dating a girl that is way out of his league in terms of physical appearance. Ruling out social media influencers and celebrities, there are WAY more times in my everyday life where we pose the question “how did he get a girl like that” vs “yea that seems right”.
Unless you have some concrete data that backs up your *assumptions*, that’s all it is–assumptions. These assumptions are self-limiting beliefs that are holding you back and destroying your confidence. It definitely takes more effort for some people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make an insanely DRASTIC change for yourself to be more physically attractive than where you are today. Losing weight WILL make your face more attractive. You might not turn into Brad Pitt, but you’ll be a lot *better looking than you are today* if you start going the gym consistently for the next year and creating a more positive mindset for yourself.
Seriously, imagine what you can do for yourself in 1 year. It seems so far away, but at the same time, it’s not as long as you think. If you’re able to keep it consistent, you’re guaranteed to see how much better you look in 2 months. I believe they say in 3 months, that’s when other people start to see the change.
I actually experienced this myself when I finally committed myself to the gym. I use to be an extremely skinny guy. I never really put in the effort to put on any mass. I finally decided that I wanted to see what this whole “consistency is key” was all about, so I went to the gym for 5-7 days a week, sometimes twice a day and educated myself outside of gym hours in terms of what I need to eat, what lifts I should do etc. I started seeing results around the end of the first month, keep in mind how much effort I put into this–this was my first big internal confidence boost. At the end of the 2nd month, *all* my coworkers one day questioned “when did you get all this muscle, what the heck?!”. Literally 1 coworker called it out loud and it caused a chain of people coming up to me and saying “I didn’t want to say anything because I wasn’t sure I believed it myself, but nice job man”. This led to them asking me about my routine etc. This was one of the biggest confidence boosts I have ever experienced. So far, nothing has really matched it.
Ironically, this made my dating life harder 😂. I had to go for girls even “higher tier” than what I was use to because my body made a lot of girls insecure (the ones I typically went for when I was skinny). And the hot ones are even more insecure because the reason they’re so “hot” is because of how insecure most of them actually are.
Im short (5’7.5 yes the half matters) Im already immediately out of the running for a LOT of women
Well as a woman yes physical attraction is important to an extent, it’s not everything though.
I used to think that physical attraction in a partner wasn’t all that important when I was in my teens and early 20s. Boyyyy was I wrong haha. Physical attraction *is* just as important as emotional attraction.
It’s not that women don’t care about looks, but it’s not the end all be all when it comes to choosing a partner. For some people working out will at least improve their self esteem a bit as well as physical appearance, though for some women personality will factor in a lot more, which is where the advice to be more confident or work on your sense of humor comes from. All in all it comes down to an individual preference that has a lot of factors to it besides appearance alone
It’s kind of like societies answer to “does my ass look fat in these jeans?”
What else we going to tell them?
“There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damned Lies, and Statistics” – Mark Twain
You make your own lie and live with it. That’s all. Pretty much everything is a lie. If you are ugly, accept it and move on. Don’t whinge, is what society says.
One more thing is woman say you are not ugly to your face, but will definitely drool over you and always talk about you to their friends, if you are super attractive.
Somebody’s troll is someone else’s prince. Everyone has their own lense. Everyone has their own preferences. I personally find muscular men as well as overweight men not in my preferences. I like an average male body. Someone who is strong enough to open a jar, but soft enough to snuggle. But it honestly comes down to security. Women are attracted to security over all physical attributes. But yes you are correct there does need to be physical attraction to be able to have a long lasting relationship.
Go to some place where the women value traditional qualities. I’ve seen some decently hot Thai chicks marry objectively disgusting men who had OK money.
I don’t think this is true. Some of the men I’ve fallen for really weren’t that good looking (now that I think of it). I fell in love with the personalities. Looks fade but not their personalities. And now I’m sleeping with a guy that’s 100 times better looking than me, but I won’t tell him 😉