I feel really bad about this. I think it’s a codependent quality where I feel like I can’t be myself anymore, feel stuck, and like the other person is taking up all my time. I love getting to know people, being their friend and feeling mutual love. But when the friendship ends up evolving to a partnership, it’s like I get a gut feeling that it’s not going to end up good, that we wasted a good friendship just to have sex on top of it, and I can’t be my own person anymore. Even though I love the person it always devolves into some sort of resentment. Does anyone else experience this?
I feel bad because It feels like this quality is holding me back from having unconditional love.
1 comment
You want to make sure you keep your independence, which is perfectly normal. Maybe try not spending all your time with someone once things evolve into a partnership. Make sure you keep spending time alone and with other people. That way you are able to be your own person as well as being in a relationship.
If you still have this feeling even if you keep investing in your own individual life, it could be fear of commitment due to trauma in your past / childhood. That’s something you could figure out with the help of a therapist.