I realised I have only gone after women in my school/college/post college life who were equal or almost equal to my financial status. I never stood a chance in this game in these circumstances. I am not rich but proper middle class if you may.
I think I can have a shot at a relationship if i went after financially poorer women. Now please understand i don’t mean to flex money on these women and exploit their condition. I just think I will have a better chance to date them with the upper hand financially. Let’s see by her standards i can probably be more educated, dress better, speak better, take her to places she hasn’t been before (for eg. a semi-high end restaurant or bar), take her on long drives in my car etc and more.
Please i am not talking about exploiting a poor girl. I am saying i am so pathetic i don’t stand a chance with girls in my financial circle. So for a financially poorer girl, I may be good enough with what I have to offer. I might have the slightest 1% chance here. I will never bring up the financial topic with her.
So has anyone dated a poorer girl? And any thoughts about what i rambled on about in this post?
7 comments
No amount of money can wash away the stench of desperation. You’d be better off working on yourself than trying to leverage your income on someone in all honesty. There are likely many people with your income with similar ideas and insecurities, but there are far less who actually stand out. So, work on standing out.
Yes and never again
How low is your self esteem for you to think the only thing you can offer a woman is your wealth? The fact that you’re even thinking of approaching a woman solely based on her financial status is concerning enough but this mentality that you’ll have better chances with someone with whom recognises your relationship as transactional won’t do your mental health any good. Besides, you deserve better than that. You shouldn’t have to be used to feel valuable to someone.
What you need to ask yourself is why your previous attempts with women haven’t worked out because I’m sure that it extends beyond what you think is purely a financial reason.
As a finanaclly poor women(lol) I don’t think it’s taking advantage. Whomever you interact with is a grown woman. You do sound a little desperate, but who isn’t I guess. You need to be more chill. It’s not like your paying her to go out with you. It’s a mutually benifically relationship. You help her and she helps you sometimes that’s just how a relationship is. Your going after these girls cause you have something you want to give and feel you can provide I mean I say go for it. But if it’s just for hookups it might be a little wierd cause then it’s like your paying them for sex. But I don’t think that’s the case so
I can say from my own experience that your situation has nothing to do with being financially superior to someone.
In my case it’s about being able to offer someone the opportunity to help them and their situation. Money is a tool after all and not a treasure.
I am also dating someone who is less financially well off than me.
Personally I want to be able to offer my girlfriend financial help because in this world money affects everything. If my girlfriend needed help to get her car fixed or to pay her rent I would hate to have to say to her I don’t have enough money to help you. That would totally make me feel like a failure as her boyfriend.
Currently my girlfriend financially makes ends meet but is in no way wealthy. I’m not rich either but I appreciate the fact that I have enough money to help her when she needs help. She’s not a Golddigger and she appreciates how hard it is to make money.
I can see in my situation it’s having the ability to make my girlfriends life easier by having financial means that she doesn’t. When people don’t have to worry about bills, life becomes happier.
You know, I forgot to mention that even dating someone making a lower income can be problematic, just in terms of it working out at all. A lot of people in the lower class and/or people working their way through college work jobs that aren’t the usual 9-5. This is both something we see (at least in American society) and in my experience. As someone who does work a 9-5, this can be somewhat hard to bear since if you do get to talk to them, it probably is something like 2 hours before they go to sleep, and they’re tired because someone shouted at them at their service job…I hope I’m not being too demeaning, but that is literally how it can pan out oftentimes. To go further, most people work **at least** one day on the weekend, so if you’re a Mon-Fri worker and want to have a date, good luck coordinating that, because it will probably never happen. It’s a bit troublesome to have a relationship if your schedules are so incompatible that you can’t get closer in the first place. So beyond everything I said previously, it is literally just on its own, ignoring any of OPs hangups and the moral implications, extremely impractical.
This is the whole premise of 90 Day Fiancé. You’re not innovative here. Many ugly, socially awkward men do this everyday. Transactional relationships are so underwhelming, but they happen all the time. Get it you mediocre sugar daddy you!