What advice would you give to someone moving to the US from Europe?

22 comments

1. I definitely think it would depend on what part of the U.S. you’re moving to.

2. Expect massive fucking portions at restaurants. Also, don’t freak out when servers start giving you shit like chips and salsa or bread or whatever. It’s usually included with your meal. But always ask if refills are free or not if you want refills. That ones important. Also don’t underestimate the size of the US. Just to take a weekend drive to my grandparents’ farm is 2 1/2 hours, and that’s not even a third of the way across my state. Also never bring up things like gun rights, religion, or politics up in friendly conversation, especially in the south. People tend to get touchy about that stuff.

3. Plan for traffic when estimating your arrival.

4. If you move out west, remember that it is mostly empty out here. Unless you’re on the interstate, you probably won’t have cell service, and there won’t be people every few miles, let alone gas stations. Many roads are not maintained, so, if you venture off pavement, expect the roads to be treacherous. Don’t venture into the desert unprepared. People can and do go missing in the wilder parts of the nation.

   I live very close to Zion, and I see a lot of European tourists. I have seen several of those tourists stranded in the middle of nowhere because they failed to appreciate how vast and empty it really is out here. Don’t be one of those people.

5. Don’t 🤣 it ain’t worth it! But if you have too, identify your political and moral views and move to a city and state that represents that. And if your view is you don’t care and you get along with everyone, that is called an independent and unfortunately there isn’t a state that represents you🤣 welcome to The new America

6. Learn how to drive, if you don’t already.

7. YouTube has tons of videos about culture shock when moving to the US (or moving from the US). They’re usually pretty entertaining too.

8. It all depends on where you’re coming from, your occupation, and where you plan on moving to. However, seeing that you like guns I’d say maybe Texas or a different state in the Midwest.

9. When you talk to citizens about your story moving here, we have huge amounts of respect for people hearing that they took the effort to move here respecting our laws and policies & want to embrace our domestic culture. Gets ya friends & great relationships real quick from good people.

10. I don’t think you’re going to like it that much after the honeymoon phase.

11. That is such a huge broad question. And what age range, marital status, kids, education, career, and interests does the European have? What area of the US is the person interested in and why? You can see how many aspects there are, so that’s why questions need to be narrowed down.

12. Get your medical stuff done before moving. People can and do go bankrupt here for medical issues.

13. Dont

14. Learn to measure distance by the time it takes to travel. When asking for directions or someone is just plain telling you where something is, you’re rarely gonna get an exact or even rough estimation of a distance, you’re instead going to get something like “it’s about 30 minutes down the road,” or “head east for about an hour and you’ll see it.”

    It doesn’t seem that important but it might save you quite a few awkward interactions where you tell someone to head south for 6 miles and they look at you weird. Worse if you say kilometers.

15. Prepare a few good stories about the old country. People will ask out of genuine curiosity and it’s a natural path for conversations with potential friends. Feel free to make light-hearted comparisons but avoid sounding like you’re shitting on America, even when we suck.

16. We have a lot of social structures around being friendly. This can vary a bit based on your region, but generally if someone is being friendly to you, you’re expected to be polite and friendly back. You don’t have to start a whole conversation with every person that says hi but they do expect you to acknowledge them in some way, even if it’s just an awkward nod. If if someone does a little kindness, like holding the door for you, you’re expected to say thanks or again at least make an awkward nod. If you can’t tell, I use the awkward nod a lot haha.

    Cheerful friendliness usually isn’t fake, but also it isn’t always an overture to friendship. Straight up asking if they want to be friends is totally acceptable. But keep in mind that someone might say yes because they don’t know how to say no. You can tell based on if they follow through on arranging to hang out sometime. A person who’s never available and who never reaches out doesn’t want to put the effort into being your friend.

    Retail store employees asking if you need any help are genuinely asking if you need any help. They’re not trying to con you into buying anything, and they’re not expecting a tip in return for their help. If you don’t need any help then a quick, “no, thanks,” will suffice.

    The standard tip for waitstaff at a sit down restaurant is 18-20% of your post tax total. Waitstaff often get paid below minimum wage in anticipation of them making it back in tips. If you can’t afford a tip then you can’t afford to eat at that restaurant. Always tip your delivery driver as well. Tipping is optional but appreciated at counter service restaurants, they do get paid at least minimum wage.

    Oh also, if you have an obvious non English accent then you’ll likely get complimented on your English. That typically isn’t meant to be condescending, that person probably just thinks it’s cool that you know English so well. We like to think that English is one of the hardest languages to learn (ha), so a lot of people are genuinely impressed by those who are fluent in English as a second language.

    That’s all I could think of that I didn’t see covered already, but feel free to ask any specific questions.

17. Stay in your lane.

18. I lived in Germany for along time and the biggest thing that shocked me when moving back to the states in 2009 was that it seemed like everyone thought they were a Hollywood movie star.

19. Don’t move, you’ll have better benefits at work over there and won’t end up homeless

20. I have a coworker (from Glasgow)that did the same thing, and she said that you really have to accept the fact that you’re moving into a consumerism nation. She also said that give up on the idea of not needing multiple cars for a family. It’s impossible to get around without one, and it’s dangerous in certain cities.

21. Don’t!

22. Honestly, it’s very likely that with some research you can find a place to live in America near a community of others from your culture, which could help with adjusting. Like in east Texas there’s a big German community, and in many larger cities you’ll find whole communities of people from specific countries and cultures living in similar areas. That’s one of the things I enjoy about the country, is just being able to meet people from all over the world pretty much anytime! I’m just in a little dinky college town in the Midwest but we have an international center at the university and people from different countries host events each month where you can come try food from their country, play different games, see art, etc. I have a new colleague here from Turkey even who just recently gave me a nice gift of a lot of different spices and teas from his home, which was so awesome.

    ONLY things I will say (just based on experiences I’ve had so far with new folks)—

    1) Americans like their personal bubbles. In some cultures it’s normal to stand very close to people you’re talking to. We like our space! That doesn’t mean you have to stand across the room but if you’re standing like a foot from me while talking it makes me feel uncomfortable and I’ll back up a little bit. Not to be rude, it’s just that level of closeness is usually reserved for more intimate relationships. I don’t even stand that close to my best friend while talking.

    2) You don’t have to worry as much about hospitality here (in general) compared to some other cultures. We’re pretty casual people on the whole. Just be friendly. Smile, use your please/thank you, friendly nods. If you’re in the Midwest or the southern states small talk/making someone laugh is usually welcome. (For example, if I’m in an elevator in the Midwest and other people come in but I’m the one by the elevator buttons, I like to joke: “Can I take your order?” as a way to ask them what floor they’re going to do I can push the right button for them since I’m blocking it by standing where I’m standing after all haha and they usually all laugh. However I’ve done the same thing in California and NYC and no one laughed or got the joke and I thought everyone hated me, they seemed so unhappy haha. Nope, I’m just a bubbly Midwesterner and folks on the coasts tend to just mind their business. They weren’t even annoyed at me, just didn’t know how to react or were surprised by my friendliness.) Anyway, tangent, but yeah. No need to be overly hospitable with gifts, or if someone comes to your house for some reason, unless they’re expecting dinner because you talked about it earlier, you don’t have to have food for them. Just be nice. Offer them a drink if you want but most Americans just expect people to be kind/friendly versus extra hospitable. Hopefully that makes sense.