When I speak to certain people – I act like a bitc\*. Excuse my language.
But I cannot describe it in other way. Somehow I perceive other people as more “valuable” than me just depending on the looks and hearing their voice. I KNOW this sounds incredibly stupid, but it’s always like that.
I act like a pleaser. My voice shakes and my confidence.. well there is none. I wonder, how can I finally break through and be free at any situation with anyone?
I feel like there is some bigger underlying problem maybe with my self-worth? I don’t know what it could be. I earn decent money, have great physique but somehow I feel “less” then other people.
Did anybody has it like me?
1 comment
As long as you are nervous and people pleasing, people will feel that. People notice the way you carry yourself. When you are nervous, your verbal and nonverbal actions tend to show it. If you keep acting nervous, people will stop associating with you. Remember people gravitate towards self confidence, not anxiety.
So do this. Genuinely connect with people you see in real life e.g. ask how they are, their hobbies, interests goals, opinions, etc. Listen and pay attention to what people say. Share those things about yourself when asked. People also subconsciously attach you to the value you bring. The value you bring is a clear, unique, and convincing reason why people will interact with you, let alone do so constantly. So Find ways to add value to their lives. Having In person interactions is the easiest way to stand out from countless people who text or message. People remember and favor in person interactions because of the positive vibes. If your hobbies, skills, talents align with their interests or can help them, bring it up and offer to help them. Finally, learn how to be genuinely busy in your life pursuing your goals and hobbies, while interacting with people on the side. People are hardwired to be repulsed by neediness and desperation and instead gravitate towards those who are self confident and well rounded in life. They want to see active confirmation of you actually doing something in your life other than just talking to them. So chase excellence, not people.