25M and I feel stuck. My therapist told me that I’m getting what I feel I deserve, so I guess the real question is: how do I get to the point where I feel like what I deserve is a relationship?
All I’ve had the past six months is hook ups, FWBs, and unreciprocated emotional/sexual interest. It feels like I’m missing out on how to do something that feels so basic.
5 comments
You are outperforming the average male that can’t get a date more than once a year.
I guess nobody can help you here, I can hookup with a girl every 3-4 months if I am lucky.
Sounds like those who are into you are in it for the looks. So what happens when the looks fade? What else you’ve got for them that they need in a relationship? You gotta figure that out.
Just try more bro
You’re not honest with yourself about what you want. If you were then you wouldn’t be preoccupied with these unavailable women and you’d be making efforts to include more women in your life
Maybe sit down with yourself and assess how you’re coming across to your dates? Are you too enthusiastic? Or not showing enough enthusiasm? Are you too serious, or too playful? What topics do you talk about on your dates? Are you getting drawn in too quickly by talking about sex, or being too open and vulnerable before the moment is right? Are you trying to force a connection where there isn’t one, or are you trying to prolong a connection when the other party has checked out?
Many different possibilities, perhaps worth discussing your attachment style with your therapist, and exploring any undiscovered childhood trauma that may be shaping your dating experience.