Should you make sacrifices for your significant other? Why or why not?

14 comments

1. I think in a long term relationship its inevitable some sacrifices will be made at some point. But they should be your choice not a decision made by your partner and sacrifices on each side should be fairly even over time.

2. I’ve been married for nearly 12 years and we both sacrifice. It’s inevitable that you’re going to make some sacrifices at some stage

3. Ummm… I would say yes. I suppose it has something to do with how significant your significant other is to you.

   I’d *really* be curious to know what people think what events/doings would fall under “sacrifice.” I’ve noticed some people’s ideas of what a sacrifice is does not resemble what I think a sacrifice is.

4. I prefer to make compromises rather than sacrifices. But my relationship is not the same as everyone else’s.

5. ‘Sacrifices’ sounds kind of one sided, and sacrifices are big. I believe in compromise, but not if it’s a sacrifice.
   For example, I won’t sacrifice my love for x or y, but if it’s infringing on our relationship (takes too much time/money/…), I will compromise and only indulge it occasionally.

6. Small ones? Sure. (Not all the time and not if it’s not reciprocated equitably though.) Compromise is part of any healthy relationship

   Life-path-altering ones? …idk about “should” but I have some stuff I’m not willing to give up, and so does my SO. For example, I would not under any circumstances give up my career be a stay-at-home parent. (Absolutely no judgement to those who do, y’all are amazing humans, but it’s a hard no for me.) That would 100% break us up which sucks but it wouldn’t be a sacrifice I would be willing to make.

7. My partner and I have wildly different dreams on where we want to settle down. He’s grown up in the center of our mountainous state for all his life, and he wants to live somewhere far away and *different* than what he’s always had. I’ve lived on the very fringe of our state, under an hour from a big city in one direction and beautiful hiking in the other, and I have a great relationship with my family, so I’d want to settle down somewhere close to the area.

   We both want to sacrifice for the other’s dreams lol. He’s said we’ll settle down in the same town that my parents live in, where all my favorite small businesses are and where my grandpa would take me to the park for him to play with the ducks and for me to play on the swings, with an amazing art museum hidden away that’s always empty but is filled with renaissance and american classic paintings.

   I want to move to costa rica or new zealand so that he can find natural beauty in whatever unpopulated area of the country he wants to settle down in, where he can go on beautiful morning walks without feeling like he’ll be jumped because there’s no one around, where he can marvel at the different plants and where we can watch the stars together.

   We’ll probably sacrifice a little bit and gain a lot by the compromise of living in another country for a few years and moving back as my parents age, so that we can spend our youth together on an adventure and spend my parents’ last years all together.

8. Depends on what that means and entails. The people in the relationship should discuss and decide based on the situation at hand

9. Yes. The key is that you each sacrifice for the other and do so joyfully because you want what is best for your family unit as a whole. If only one person sacrifices and not the other, then that creates a huge problem.

10. I think this is very subjective to the context of what is being ‘sacrificed’ and as others have stated I think compromises are a healthier approach than sacrifices.

    I think if you are serious about the relationship and its long-term potential, being able to compromise important . E.g. let say you’re in a partnership with someone who hates going out on Friday nights but it is something you love, a compromise could be that you go out/stay in on alternate Fridays. A bigger compromise would be something like having to relocate for a partners job when you’re perfectly happy where you are (and how you compromise can vary greatly, whether its giving long-distance a go or taking a leap of faith and relocating completely with them).

    I think that if you start looking at these decisions as sacrifices though, you need to re-assess the relationship and whether it is a priority (which if it’s not, it’s fine). I can tell you that after being with someone for over 6 years (29F currently), romantic relationships are not a priority.

11. Depends on the sacrifice. I made a lot of sacrifices to my detriment when I was married. I will be a lot more selective with any sacrifice I am expected to do to make a relationship work in the future. I will not be relocating, changing my career, making any unnecessary major purchases, or taking on any debt that I did not create for any relationship.

12. A sacrifice could be working more or less hours because your SO needs assistance on something. It could be waking up earlier to have breakfast together or staying up late to see them. It could be never drinking alcohol because they are recovering from addiction.

    A sacrifice is anything you willingly do even if you don’t like it. It doesnt have to be huge. And yes, you should be willing to sacrifice some things for your SO and viceversa, as long as it is something you are comfortable with.

13. yes, within reason. their well-being and happiness should be significant to you.

14. I don’t know what you would consider to be a “sacrifice” vs. a compromise, but relationships are give and take. The one thing you should *never* compromise are your values.