Me (M22) and my girlfriend (F24) have a relationship, and we are almost 3 months in that, we have sex a few times during the first month, but since month 2 my girlfriend doesn’t want to have any sexual contact with me, I told her it’s alright, but sometimes I really want to do it.
I definitely don’t want to push her to do something she doesn’t want, We talked about it a couple of times, she told me that I must not be worried, she says she loves me and desires me, but she just doesn’t want to do that right now.
Sometimes I think about just leaving her, but the relationship is very good in other aspects ( she really shows me how she loves me, she understands me, and shes been a support for me from the start)
There are some things I need to add to my post
My girlfriend usually have pain in the times we had sex, we went to the doctor and the doctor said it was something psychological (this happened in the month 2)
She let me touch her body full, but not to try to turn her up
When we talk about it, she told me that she only doesn’t want to do it, because she doesn’t feel horny because of her depression
I want to hear an advice
( Btw, if there’s something that I wrote wrong or there is something that isn’t clear lemme know, and I will clarify your doubts)
TL;DR! I’m afraid because my girlfriend doesn’t want to have any sexual contact with me, but I’m not really sure if I want to end up the relationship
9 comments
What happened in month 2?
[deleted]
What’s her reason for wanting to abstain? This is important information and it’s missing from your post. Also three months in you are just getting to know each other. There is no established deep bond between you two, no matter how amazing she looks to your new relationship energy brain, so you need to be thinking about whether a sexless relationship is something you want or can at least tolerate in the long run.
You’ll have to give more context if you want advice. Nobody here knows why she decided or what she said when you talked to her about it… But the bottom line is, if you want sex in a relationship and neither of knows how long this will last, break up, otherwise, she just denoted you to a friend.
A relationship without sex is pretty much just a friendship. I would however ask her if there’s any reason as to why she suddenly doesn’t want to have sex anymore and if there’s any way that you could make her want to have sex again.
Try asking her what she is into.
Sounds like she just wants a cuddly roommate.
This guy doesn’t know he doesn’t have a girlfriend and just has a friend, shhhhhh dont tell him.
Dump her. Sex is non-negotiable in a relationship. What on earth are your reasons for staying? A dead bedroom is a valid reason to split, no matter the circumstances.
Sounds like she has vaginismus, which is entirely treatable and very often curable. She needs to talk to her doctor about treatment options.