I think he’s the one, should I wait on him?
Recently me [17F] and my ex boyfriend [18M] got back together after a year.
For some background let me explain our story. Around a year ago we got together. I always could tell he never felt the same for me but I didn’t wanna say anything until he broke up with me. I just wanted to be good for him but he went back to his ex. Recently he sat down with me and apologized for the way he’d acted and how he didn’t see how there was a girl (me) who truly cared about him right in front of his eyes. He told me that he looked for something that wasn’t there in his ex and was in me all along.
We both knew that in the fall he’d be going to school hours away from me so the night he apologized we agreed to be friends and wait until I finally move near him again to give US another shot. My feelings hadn’t gone away from him even after he broke up with me a while back, but I was glad me and him were on good terms. After he’d apologized about a week went by and he asked me on a date. I was confused and thought me and him were gonna try again in a year but went with it. I could tell he really loved me this time and his actions followed.
I’ve known this man for a while to know that he wouldn’t say something if he didn’t mean it. So that’s how I knew he did. We always were stuck on the fact that he’d be hours away and how it was gonna tear us apart.
This past week me and him came to the consensus that we were better off as friends for now because he was moving away. He said he cared for me and loved me and that’s why he thinks we should stay friends until I moved hp there too. We still talk and text but I can’t help but be upset. Obviously us being friends was going to happen anyway when he left and we were both going to get hurt but idk. I know that I love him so deeply that my feelings won’t change for him. However i get scared that he will find someone better and i’ll have waited for nothing.
TL;DR: Basically my question is that should I wait on him if my feelings have never gone away??? I feel like they would’ve gone away if he wasn’t right for me and he wouldn’t have come back.
2 comments
People talk about waiting for someone they aren’t in a relationship with, and I do not understand why anyone would do that. Why be exclusive with somebody who is not exclusive with you and isn’t even in a relationship with you? What possible benefit is there to you in waiting?
If you instead go on with your life you lose absolutely nothing. If someday in the future you two are in a position to be in a relationship together, then you can consider it then. If instead he is interested but you are happily in a good relationship, then you will be happy and glad of your choice to not wait. If you aren’t happily in a relationship, then you can get into a relationship with him then. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by living your life and making the best of it based on your current situation, which is that you two are not in a relationship and he does not currently want to be in one with you.
Absolutely do not wait on anyone. If you think he really cares about you and you guys are meant to be together, it’ll happen either way. You’re so young, don’t put your life on hold for anyone but especially for a man. If he wants to work it out, let him figure it out. You just focus on you.