I can see it on people around me. They text their partners ALL THE TIME. Phone in hand constantly. I wouldn’t mind, it’s their lives ofc, but it creates the new standard and expectations and my gf wants it too, otherwise our relationship is somehow lesser and I’m being secretive, I guess. No, I’m not. I just don’t feel the need to tell her every single detail of my day at work. I value our time together but I just don’t have time and energy to be texting ALL THE TIME. Plus I already have enough screen time due to work. Texting is usually send a message – wait 30 sec to 2 mins – receive a reply – text back. It’s slow, time-demanding and distracting. I need to fill those 2 mins with doing something and I just can’t focus like that. I don’t think it’s a problem if my partner doesn’t know what I’m up to throughout the morning or afternoon. I text her good morning and have a quick exchange, over lunch I let her know about my day and then in the evening. That feels like the proper amount to me but I guess I’m the minority these days. Anyone relates? Just looking for a kindred spirit I guess…
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I hate it. I dated a young woman that understood I was busy or tired. The rest of them need constant back and forth.
I always found that weird… Personally, I only value face to face conversations and I couldn’t care less for all of these messages. The worst thing is when one uses text to discuss important relationship’s issues.
I had a gf who wouldn’t tell me anything when we met I mean any concerns although she looked concern but when I asked she said “fine”. Afterwards she would suddenly blow me up with all of these issues and things that she was insecure about like me meeting another girl I was only friends with.
I don’t get it you put time and effort to build a relationship in real life and then spend most of it on social media, phones and so on. What’s the point?
I get that you want to be in touch but if you live in the same city is it really necessary to check on each other every breathing second? We’ve got lives apart from the relationship and that’s okay. Any thoughts on that?
I definitely understand. I believe humans weren’t meant to be in such CONSTANT contact- and with potentially tens to HUNDREDS of people a day! People definitely weren’t meant to know what someone was doing all day every day at the push of a button. No wonder so many people are burnt out. Makes me feel appreciative of when telegrams and mail were primarily used to keep in contact with someone. Phones, but mostly social media- has really messed up how we see ourselves and others.
I remember years ago I was a serial texter, BAD HABIT!
It’s not a standard unless you make it a standard.
My advice to you is not to fall for it, don’t let them get used to texting you, if they got used to texting you constantly and you go onboard often, it’s gonna be a pain to reverse that habit and it’s too much drama.
I prefer to text the same way. If she brings it up you should explain why you prefer texting this way and stand up for yourself.