I keep setting goals before I finally start dating but once I achieve them, my goals advance and I feel back at square one with my progress. If I keep this up, I’ll spend eternity waiting to feel ready to date.

5 comments

1. Dating shouldn’t be a career, a job… Dating should be a pleasure. Stop dating if you only get these negative hits to your self-esteem.

   Relationships happen in many ways, dating is just one of them, and not even the most efficient one

2. If you want to date you only need to fill these .

   1. Get a nice body.

   2. Be mentaly stable

   3. Life in order (job, hobbies, useful skills, no major problems…)

   4. Good wardrobe

   5. Keep your place clean and nice.

   6. Have some free time.

   7. Have some money to spend.

   If you can checked all of these, you are ready to date . Good luck and have fun.

3. Self-improvement is important, but keeping your dating/social skills sharp should also be a priority. It’s not a one shot deal my man. Go on dates with lots of different women. That way, if one comes along that you’re willing to commit to, you know how to handle her.

4. You have a fear of commitment.

   This manifests itself exactly as you describe.

   Step away from dating completely and go get therapy.

5. You can continue on your self improvement while still dating. You don’t need to achieve a perfect version of yourself before you date, because as you said, the goal post moves and you’re back to setting more goals.

   I like to think of dating skills like a muscle. The more you exercise this muscle, the better you’ll get. There are so many lessons to learn and mistakes to make, these are not something you can learn just by reading and talking about it. We need to gain our own experience to learn our own lessons, there’s no set path for everyone. Accept your own flaws, remain humble and open minded, and head out there and start getting to know people. Be kind, be curious, but be firm and be direct.