A good friend of mine (47 W) asked Me (47W) a few months back for $575 loan to help pay her electric bill. I had the extra and immediately told her to come get a check. She kept apologizing, she’s very proud but hey shit happens and I’m finally in a place where I had the money to give. She came up with a payment, half at the end of April, rest end of May. She gave me $300 in April, but nothing in May. It’s June and she still hasn’t said anything. She’s a single mom, a good friend and I know she’s struggling to pay for college for her son.
She helps me with my dog. A lot. I have a 15 year old Lab, Lilly. She keeps her if I need to go out of town( Lilly doesn’t board well) she’ll come over and let her out if I need to work late. I’ve offered to pay her multiple times and she refuses to take it.
Should I let the remaining $275 go? Could I use it back? Of course but it’s not going to affect me financially.
My only issue is if she needs a loan again, I’ll need the money back. I can let it go this time but I don’t want to set the expectation that I’ll loan you money and you won’t have to pay me back. I had the extra this time, but that won’t always be the case.
5 comments
That’s a big electric bill. 😅
Since you guys are close, I’d suggest mentioning it to her. Let her know that you know money it tight, but that you’d appreciate being paid back when she can. Like you mentioned, if she needs financial help down the line, would be uncomfortable if it isn’t addressed.
I would explain to her exactly what you just posted. Tell her you’re going to waive the last $275 THIS TIME only because she’s helped you a lot. Helping with pups is tedious so I think it’s good you’d consider that since you haven’t paid her for it (since she refused). There may not even be a next time. If there is, make sure your repayment is written and signed (as much as it would suck). It’s to protect both of you.
I’d say ask for it back. Even if she cant pay it back she at least needs to acknowledge that she still owes you money.
If you choose to forgive the loan just let her know that she cant ever borrow money from you again. I call it setting money on fire when I give it to someone who promised to pay me back but doesn’t, and you don’t have money to set on fire right now.
I know she helps you out with your dog and she probably doesn’t ask for money because she knows she owes you money but if she thinks it’s subtracting from her loan she needs to say something.
Money can drive a rift between friends and I hope that doesn’t happen here.
One of the most important messages my mother ever told me: Don’t lend money if you’re not okay with never seeing it again. It’s unfortunate and cynical, but very often that’s exactly how it plays out.
In your situation, I would ask your friend one more time for the remaining balance. With any luck, she will pay back the full amount. However, if she does not, I would try to make peace with not getting your loan back by remembering she has helped you out with your dog for free, when she very well could have rightly asked for compensation, yet didn’t. And don’t loan her money in the future.
If your happy to write this money off then i wouldnt mention it to her. Whats the chances of her asking for more money when she already owes you some. Probably v low.