My gf and I have been dating for almost 3 years now (our anniversary is coming up in a couple weeks). We met in our last year of hs and have been doing long distance throughout the last two years in college. We are each other’s first significant other. Everything was amazing with her for the first year and a half. Staying up late and texting each other all the time, etc. Last summer, I started to have doubts about our relationship. I didn’t want to see her as much, my texting became pretty dry, and I didn’t feel like myself. I was going through a rough patch with my mental health and I felt like I needed time to work on myself so I decided we should take a short break in hopes that I could repair myself and make our relationship better. We separated for a couple weeks and I felt like I was in a better place to resume where we had left off. Our relationship did improve after our very short time apart.
Fast forward to this past spring and I started to have doubts on whether I am still interested in her. I love her dearly but I’m just not as interested in her as I used to be. I find myself not wanting to spend time with her, feeling like she’s become clingy with the amount of times that she wants to FaceTime me, not putting in as much effort anymore. She’s told me that I’m the love of her life/soulmate and envisions a long life with me down the road. I still love her but I feel like the spark has faded on my end and I don’t know what to do. I know that it will crush her heart if we were to separate again especially before our three year anniversary. I just don’t know if this is just a dry spell and maybe my feelings will return or if it’s better to move on to other people. I just don’t want to lose something special in case my feelings do come back.
I feel emotionally lost rn and I’m looking for advice. Thx for reading
TL;DR I’ve felt that the spark in our relationship is gone on my end and I don’t know whether to stick around and see if I comes back or to try and move on.
1 comment
Yeah, it’s very rare for your/anyone else’s first relationship to be “The One”, and it’s normal to outgrow relationships (especially at your young age). Don’t feel pressured to stay in a relationship that you’re losing interest in. It’s not fair to you OR her. Break up gently, be by yourself for a while, and be open to explore other relationships when you’re ready.