I don’t know if life in general is against me (or mother nature). But sometimes it seems as if some invisible force is trying to sabotage me.
I rarely get crushes on people, so when I do, it’s a big deal. Big enough that I invest in getting to know the person so that I can see if I’d like to ask them out on a date (normally that motivation to get to know someone flirtatiously just isn’t there). So when it is I seize on it like a hot iron.
The problem, I find, is that as soon as my conscious mind makes this decision to get to know my crush, every player imaginable comes out to inadvertently embarrass me in front of my crush. And it’s incredibly frustrating.
The other day, for instance, I had a very pleasant conversation with my crush at work that felt like it had a lot of chemistry. And then it was punctuated by serving a middle-aged mother who is the wife of an ex-employee at the store. I barely know her, but I suppose to not make the interaction awkward, she kept trying to make conversation, but would make it super awkward by asking me about my private love life.
*”So… Do you have yourself a special gal in your life yet? ;)”*
The question came out of literally nowhere. And cornered me into a situation where I’d have to say aloud whether I either do or do not have a girlfriend (I don’t). But what a way to kill the tension in front of my crush. So I just changed subjects and focused on the woman, and asked about her family and how they are doing. And every time the conversation would die she would just pivot back to asking me about my love life for some reason. Like, can we not?… I’ve not answered you several times. How do you not get the hint yet?…
I finally and reluctantly admit to not having a girlfriend. And she brings up her own son (in comparison to her daughter who is engaged and pregnant) and boy it just makes both of us seem like lonely bachelors.
”Haha, I always ask my son Brendan if there are any girls he likes. And he’s always like ‘mom, you’re embarrassing me”.