I’m currently 29 no kids, and dating. Most women around my age range have kids already and I want to meet women that have no kids but at this age it feels nearly impossible. Then I was told to date younger, early 20s younger like fresh out of college or currently in, and it makes me feel like a creep just thinking about that, I even turned down a woman simply because she was 19, it just doesn’t feel right to me.
My family always preached to me don’t have kids right now, you have plenty enough time. Meanwhile the women in my age range have experienced different relationships, dating, and have had children by this time. I’m not trying to end up in a ready made family, I want the opportunity to have my own family with a woman that’s single with no children.
One of the “old heads” in my family always told me this since I was younger, “Whether he’s a deadbeat or not, she loved him enough to a point to where she carried his seed, it may not work out, but the bond never goes away, he can pop up out of the blue and your life will change, best to have your own than someone else’s”.
But man it’s hard to, women who don’t have kids yet feel invincible and their options are endless in their minds and they are going to weigh those options and rightfully so, which makes it difficult for a guy like me who’s getting a little bit older but haven’t hit that major milestone still.
A solid reason for why I haven’t done it yet is due to my own paranoia, will she get pregnant take off put me on child support and paint me as a deadbeat to the rest of the world? If it doesn’t work out will I ever get to see my child again? I even saw a video where a man went to pick up his child due to legal visitation rights and was killed by the stepdad shortly after arriving. I don’t know guys I’m thrown for a loop, and if it seems I’m all over the place it’s because I am, I just want to put myself in the best possible situation with this to set myself up for success.