Me and my husband are in our 30s. We often watch porn together. It’s nothing too crazy or niche, nothing that would offend or upset me. Anyway I was out of town the other day and when I come back we were about to watch some together when I notice he had some tabs open of porn categories he was searching through while I was gone. There were categories like “hot Asian” “hot Latina” which hurt my feelings a bit since I’m not either of those things- “petite women”- which I’m also definitely not- and the one that struck out the most and that I can’t stop thinking about- “teens.” I’m pretty creeped out. He’s in his mid 30s. Why is he watching teen porn? Is that normal? That’s what he wants to watch when I’m out of town?? I don’t know what to think.
13 comments
These all sound like the top watched categories. Maybe he just opened the top categories. A lot of men are into teen porn, obviously the actors aren’t really teens.
That said, just because you watch sth doesn’t mean you want to do it in reality.
Its all normal. I would feel unthreatened. From a mans perspective I have watched some of the most intense and wild porn as well as other graphic videos. It does not mean that I want to fo what Im watching. Porn is for fantasy. It may even be more threatening if he watched only strictly potn of women thaat resembled you because then you might think he wanted the next best thing. Idk. We are all different . Hope this helped a little
It could be his preference as you suggested. It could also be that he just wanted to watch something different for a change. Your best bet would be to discuss this with him, try not to be accusatory. Perhaps having a broader discussion about porn preferences and mentioning you noticed the tabs.
His porn categories seem pretty normal. I wouldn’t worry too much about them unless you feel like it’s affecting your sex life
Porn or other fantasies isn’t an indication of what he actually wants.
Instead of getting angry or Self conscious why don’t talk to him about his porn habits to better understand him.
This would have to be done without judgement or anger. If you can’t do that I wouldn’t bring it up at all
you are freaking out about absolutely nothing.
Those all sound completely normal, they are usual the top categories on most sites. Browsing does not equal wanting
I watch a lot of stuff that isn’t something I’d actually want IRL. I wouldn’t read too much into it. But you could tell him to close his tabs out of consideration.
That all sounds very normal. And yes, a guy can be into both petite and full bodied women. People will often fantasize about what they don’t have or what they are turned on by but would never do in real life (rape or bdsm fantasies, teens, family…..). Fantasy/masturbation allows us to safely explore the forbidden – it seems to be human nature.
These are definitely some of the most common categories. To clarify, “Teens” means 18 and 19 year old girls, not minors.
For some perspective on why he’s looking at girls rush don’t look like you, it’s not that he likes them better or secretly desires that type over you. It’s just that they’re different than you. Again, not different in a better way. Just different. It’s a variety thing.
My wife is not a petite woman and I watch porn of girls who are much smaller than her and also much bigger than her. It’s not a judgement on our partners, it’s just appreciating the variety of the female body.
Sounds like you’re projecting your own insecurities. Because you are not young, petite, latina, or asian you feel like he is not allowed to watch those things?
Have you ever looked at porn of a man that was different ethnicity than your husband? Bigger penis? Smaller penis? More fit than your husband? Different color hair than him? Or do you only look at porn with doppelgangers of your husband in it?
As a woman, it would and definitely does bother me. Men would most definitely make an issue of it if we looked at that type of men in porns. Double standards are not okay.
Honestly coming from a 20m everything is normal but the teen part. If you guys are married both in 30s it’s a bit weird for him to be getting off on people the age of high schoolers. Once you hit that 25 mark i think teens should be out of your mind. I know a lot of guys on here don’t agree and say it’s normal but a lot of guys are attracted to those “kid like features/characters”. Also, he’s watching it when you’re there it’s just nice to have more space so office chairs are nice and comfy.
Doesn’t seem particularly bad. Try and put it in perspective. At least he didn’t confess to you that he is fighting a terrible urge to cheat with you with women he finds more attractive. Personally, something like that would kill me although I’ve asked around and some people (men mostly) find THAT perfectly normal too.
It’s find if you just tell him that it made you uncomfortable. Talking about it and being honest is usually the best course.