So to keep everything as short as possible there is a girl at my university that I started liking, and I think she gave me all the right hints. To make it simple this includes compliments like “I like your hair stile”, “you are smart”, “this is awesome”; The there were some occasion that she accompanied me on my way home so that we can talk, and on one occasion she even called me to wake me up in the morning as I was running late for an important period. So as I said I started liking her and this has been going for about one month, so I invited her out via text.
Before mentioning the date she said that she was a little sick, but mostly joked about it when I asked her how she felt. So I decided that even with the possible sickness, I was worth mentioning a date. Before mentioning the date she said that she was a little sick, but mostly joked about it when I asked her how she felt. So I decided that even with the possible sickness, I was worth mentioning a date. So I did and she accepted, we start planning and at some point she asked is anyone else is coming, at this point I decided to be blunt and tell her “no”, and asking if she was ok with this. She then proceeded to propose a new date, location changing from a mall for a walk along the river. I’m new to the city so I just didn’t know any better places, but the new location was much more suited, I accept and the date was fixed. But as the date, day approaches, she tells me that she doesn’t feel good and cancels. I for one believe her, she showed genuine interest even after the initial misunderstanding, and after getting better I invited her again, and again she accepted. I know that a cancelation now means solid, firm rejection, but if the date happens, I want to make my intentions clear.
I don’t fall in love madly with people, this person is someone I got interested in and started liking, I want to know if there is potential there, I want to know them better and I want to make my attraction to them clear, not in any creepy way, so that no confusion plagues any further interaction. Any advice on how to proceed?
4 comments
Before you go on the date just ask “hey, just to check, this is a romantic date, as I really like you and want to check we are on the same page, if the date goes well I would really like to date you exclusively if that’s something you also want. Just wanted to make sure my intentions were clear and that you might want the same thing”
avoid the plague
>I decided to be blunt and tell her “no”, and **asking if she was ok with this**. She then **proceeded to propose a new date, location changing** from a mall for a walk along the river. I’m new to the city so I just didn’t know any better places, but the new location was much more suited, **I accept**
She’s gaming your ass. It’s a lost cause, you already fell for the okie doke plus you allowed her to lead which led you to it.
A day before the date you could ask something like: “Are you ready for our river date tomorrow?” That way you are referring to it as a date. I guess calling it a *romantic* river date might go too far for your taste. It should be a proper reflection of your personality, so you decide.
On the date itself I’d say you are going to be fine, when you go with the truth. Honesty is a good trait and luckily what you have to say is just perfect. Being madly in love this early on would be creepy. Your approach of seeing her as interesting, starting to like her, and going on this date to look whether there is potential for more, is the right tone for a first date. Tell her just that.