My (25f) husband (25m) is really scaring me. We just got back from going out to dinner. Throughout the whole date he kept making sexual comments about me and I had politely asked him to stop acting that way in public. He continued despite me being visibly uncomfortable. I was trying to explain to him on the ride home how he was disrespecting my feelings. He then starts making all of these comments about shooting himself and how I’m not treating him like a human being. He then picked something out of his teeth and wiped it on my arm. This obviously made me very upset and I couldn’t control my emotions anymore and told him he was acting like a toddler and that he had no respect for me or my feelings. After saying this, we stop at a red light and he starts to open the drivers side door to get out. I asked him what he was doing. He closes the door as the light turns green but it doesn’t latch. We drive a few hundred feet and then he takes a sharp right and the door flies open. I scream and start crying because I was afraid he was going to jump out. After I start crying, he asks very calmly “what’s the matter? Why are you crying?” As if he didn’t just try to attempt jumping out of a moving vehicle to scare me. He shut the car door as if nothing happened. We get home, he gets out of the car and says “you just stay in here and calm down for a minute.” I was crying hysterically and asking what I had did wrong to deserve to be treated that way. Now he has locked himself in our bedroom with our dog and I don’t know what to do. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened.

42 comments

  1. >This isn’t the first time something like this has happened.

    And it won’t be the last if you stay…

  3. Before you leave him can you call him and figure out what up the erratic behavior. He might need professional help and these might be the signs that (hopefully not) leads up to his suicide

  6. I think you need to call police and ambulance for yourself and him. Has he taken something?

  8. I would leave immediately but call the police to let them know that you need them to do a welfare check. He sounds like he is having a mental break OR if not, still needs some type of mental assistance. I would not return it is sorted though.

  9. OMG. You need to get your dog and yourself out of there now. Can you go to your parent’s, friend’s, or relative’s house? Do not leave the dog with him under any circumstance as he may harm the dog in order to draw you back in.

    This is, at the very least, mental abuse. He enjoys making you uncomfortable and ramping up his behavior to the point you are hysterical.

    Visit the [National Domestic Violence Hotline](https://www.thehotline.org/) (if you’re in the US) and talk to someone who can help you get out of this relationship safely.

  10. If he has any living relatives tell them about what he did so they can get him help and then divorce his crazy butt you don’t deserve to be treated like an object! Then when he didn’t get his way like a child he threatened to kill himself!

  12. He’s clearly having a mental breakdown if this has never happened before. Get him help and get out.

  13. I’m not being sarcastic, I’m deadass serious… does your husband do drugs? Because that’s what this sounds like… also, like everyone else has said, get the doggo and get away from that situation.

  14. You need to leave. His behavior will get worse. Get away. Stay somewhere he doesn’t know. Then call the police for a welfare check on him. He is unhinged

  15. That is extremely abusive OP, and it will only escalate and get much worse. You need to make a plan with someone you trust to leave.

  16. You needed to leave like yesterday. Take your dog, social documents, and phone and flee. This man is going to KILL you if you stay.

  18. This sounds like either drugs or mental illness. Regardless, none of this is your fault. His actions are terrifying. I’m scared for you.

    Do you have family or friends you can confide in, get support from and stay with for a short while? I know it’s easier for us to have these judgement calls and for you to blame yourself and stay but PLEASE keep yourself safe.

  19. So, uh….

    when he comes out, you play nice. Apologize for freaking out, you had a rough day…whatever.

    as soon as he’s asleep, get your dog, your important papers, and bail.

  20. What did you do wrong? Huh?

    You saw your husband acting like a suicidal, emotionally volatile psychopath, and *you’re* thinking about what *you* did wrong? My Lord. And this isn’t the first time? Christ Almighty, what a pity.

    Leave. Take the dog and leave. Now. Get away from that piece of feces you call a husband.

  21. Exit your home and take your car. Take your important belongings like wallet and social security card, phone, and call the police. Stay with someone else, and divorce this man, otherwise, you’ll cease to exist one day.

  22. Oh my… God. This man is unhinged in a way I’ve never seen before on here. This man is going to kill you. Leave NOW.

  24. This sounds like a mental manic breakdown. If so he’s very dangerous right now. This is how women end up dead. And tomorrow he might not remember any of this. Get yourself and your dog someplace safe.

  26. I had a boyfriend like this. He took drugs and didn’t tell me. When I suspected something he would lie.

    He is putting you in danger acting like that. Please take care of yourself!

  27. Leave yesterday. I hate to think how this insane behaviour will progress if you don’t.

  28. he is never going to stop manipulating you, please leave. it will NEVER get better.

  32. I don’t see how it can be anything but drugs or a mental breakdown. Leave for the night or for a few days and see if he can return to baseline and talk to him about it. You say he’s been weird before, so you probably already know he’s ill somehow. That’s no excuse for randomly attacking you.

  33. You did nothing wrong. Your husband is abusive and you need to get out. You set a reasonable boundary and he punished you because it made him mad. In your husband’s mind you are not allowed to say No. His behavior is not healthy or acceptable and you can’t make someone change.

  37. CAll the police/prevention hotline and tell them what he’s down and he’s sewer-slidal. If you need time to get out, they’ll hold him for a few days. It’s really inhumane in there but he doesn’t need to out you at risk. If you want to help him, encourage him to seek help for bipolar. I’m bipolar myself and these are symptoms of a hypo-manic episode. For men especially

  39. Is he on drugs? I’m not kidding, like this really sounds like he may be on some heavy drugs 😳

  40. As a man. To a female. Please run. My mom dated quite a few nutcases when I was younger and helpless. Please get out safely. I’m no holy roller. But I’ll pray for you. Things like this scare me and make me get all sweaty because I know what you are feeling.

  41. Grab important papers (social security card, birth certificate, passport, etc) and RUN. Someone that unhinged is a millimeter away from literal murder.

  42. *Hello 911? My husband is threatening to kill himself*

    Baker Act.

    Take dog, block number, stay somewhere safe, divorce him.

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