Husband of five years has huge mood swings. When he is in a good mood things are wonderful! He holds doors, buys flowers, makes dinner tells me I am beautiful.
When he is in a bad mood he overreacts to minor issues, lectures me, talks over me, won’t look at me, yells, physically steps away if I come near him. He yells at the TV, complains about everything, states why he is right while the world is wrong and is argumentative.
On the odd occasion I know what has upset him, but typically I don’t know when this is coming.
I have tried to talk about his moods affecting our marriage and he believes that I am too sensitive.
He never apologizes, but tells me I did something to make him angry and I need to think about it.
I don’t trust him him to not ruin my day, I don’t like being around him because he can be so mean and angry.
I feel like I live in a war zone waiting for the next bomb to drop.
I am in counselling but doesn’t seem to help. Husband refuses the therapy. Where do I go from here?
3 comments
Yikes sounds like a man period cycle.
Have you tried turning him off, then on again?
In all seriousness just give him space, be nice and just turn the other cheek. Tell him he is being awful and ask him to explain what his wrong.
Have you specifically asked your counselor about this? This is intolerable.
This is who he is and he’s determined to remain exactly like this for the rest of his life. He cares a lot about his feelings, but has clearly demonstrated that he has no concern for your feelings at all. Blaming you for his anger is definitely abusive, possibly narcisisstic.
That means he’ll be this way towards you for the rest of your life unless he somehow has a rare, major-league epiphany. We’ve seen a handful of men in this sub over the years who had that epiphany and realized how abusive they’ve been, but it’s always been as their wives are wrapping up the divorce.
That leaves you with the decision on how you want your life to be. Life is so very short. No one deserves this type of abuse.