How have you dealt with having a partner that will not grow up and be a responsible adult?

3 comments

1. Hard truths and sit down conversations. My partner is a big time nerd and still likes collecting figurines and will spend hundreds on a lightsaber when I met him we were in uni and he had 0 financial sense, to the point i ended up buying all his groceries. I sat him down and said the most important thing is bills after that you can look at other stuff but bills always come first.
   It’s taken a few close calls of his bank reaching 0 and I’d have loan him money to stop any charges (he did always pay it back). He’s in a position now where he still spends most of his money on toys or video games but at least he’s making sure the bills are covered first, and understands the importance of having a little savings.
   Equally his tidying/cleaning skills were non-existent and that’s taken a few serious conversations of how I can’t be the only one who cleans up as it was making depressed that my days off were spent cleaning after him. He does clean now as well (maybe not as well as me but it’s better than not attempting it).

2. Sent him back to his folks. It took awhile for it to show, but there was no way in hell I was going to hand-hold an adult when my parents taught me to do shit for myself early on.

   I don’t have the patience, and cannot respect an adult who won’t grow the fuck up. Single for life is much preferable.

3. Split up. I’m still friends with his much smarter sister and that’s why I know that years later, he’s still on the same level. No regrets at all.