I (27F) want to meet more men out in public, like parks, grocery stores, concerts, etc. BUT
I don’t know how to tell if a man is available and/or interested. Sometimes they smile at me in passing and I smile back but that’s it. And I wonder are they just being friendly or were they checking me out? Should I have stopped them and talked to them?
If I want to be approached, how should I communicate that to men? I mean what causes men to think a woman is single and would be interested in them?
28 comments
You could try walking up to him and striking up a conversation
At all would be nice. I am never going to pick up on you trying to seem like you want to be approached. Just approach them first if you’re that interested.
Ask about the shoes
This doesnt happen.
Last week, I was taking lunch in a restaurant’s terrace and a woman came over to ask me if food was good enough and if I recommend the restaurant. I was quite surprised that it came from a woman, but I also assumed that I needed to make the first “personal” step. I didn’t and here I am on Reddit.
Most men don’t approach women because of all the conteversy around men coming off as creepy…we’re just bloody nervous. I would need a look that screams “come hither.”
Just a smile and say hi. A guy that likes you too will go from there
Tbh i dont even care. Just say hi or whatever. Just say anything and im happy. And if you wanna keep talking ask for my number bc i probably wont ask. I dont have the balls for that lol
Stand nearby for a short amount of time, not with your back to them. Try to make eye contact and smile. Be approachable. Express interest in what they’re doing.
I’ll often just sit in public playing Pokemon go on my phone and check people out who walk past me. Sometimes there’s a woman walking alone or a group who stops near me for whatever reason and I can casually chat. I’ve gotten a phone number or 2 this way. Sometimes I’ll sit in a cafe and just read on my phone or listen to an audiobook. I often strike up a conversation with the staff. Just be in public, be approachable, smile, do things you would otherwise be doing. Don’t be shy about saying hi to a stranger and asking them what they’re up to or what brings them to where they are.
From the front.
Give us a compliment to let us know you’re physically attractive. Tell us we have nice eyes or you noticed our smile. That way we know the possibility of intimacy is on the table.
Just talk. 80% of the questions on this sub could be answered the same way.
Talk to people. Take a chance. What is they’re in a relationship? They’ll tell you, and you respect that. Nothing bad will happen, I promise.
Start up a dang conversation.
I don’t like to be, it’s an impossibly foreign concept to me and the idea of it genuinely freaks me out.
But, if it’s some magical time that I’m not completely in my own head. Then just come up and strike up a conversation and be flirty (open body language, laugh, break the physical barrier).
It never happens to me so I have no opinions on HOW you should do it. Just do it.
>want to meet more men out in public, like parks, grocery stores, concerts, etc.
That pretty much kills it for me, to be honest.
>If I want to be approached, how should I communicate that to men?
Either you don’t have to do anything because men approach you on their own or you can’t do anything because there is no “sign” or “hint” that works.
“How do you like” is probably the wrong way to put it, because it doesn’t happen often enough to men to have any kind of preference. We take it however it comes. It takes zero creativity to get a man’s attention. We’re very simple and not as selective. Literally any approach should work. As long as you’re direct because we don’t take subtle hints well. He should know for sure that you’re into him, or else chances are he’ll guess you’re just being friendly and nothing will come out of your approach
Say anything. “Hi, how are you going.” is fine.
>Should I have stopped them and talked to them?
Yes
From behind. Slowly.
Head on from the front, don’t make any big sudden movements or too much eye contact or else I might get spooked and run back into the forest. If you hold out a treat in an open palm it helps too.
Directly. Clearly. Intelligibly.
>I don’t know how to tell if a man is available and/or interested.
It’s almost like people don’t have it tattooed on their forehead whether they’re in a relationship regardless of whether they sit or stand to pee.
I’m only 18, and I have no experience. Don’t take my word at all seriously.
If a woman is approaching me, I would love a simple conversation, and a little number/instagram slip. First conversation may be awkward, but I’d love it anyway.
If one wants to signal me, I’m definitely gonna miss the signal. Best to just say something.
Preferably by being approached, maybe throw some words in there at some point. Possibly even convey that interest using these aforementioned words.
Most men would marry you on the spot for doing this.
>If I want to be approached, how should I communicate that to men?
Well, what’s stopping you from approaching them? I guarantee no man would have any complaints about you doing so.
Say “Hi”, tell me your name, and ask for mine.
We are quite simple minded.
If he smiled at you while passing by, he was most definitely checking you out.
Give him a snarky comment next time.
If a woman is coming onto me “ flirting” just be direct! I don’t pick up on subtle hints well.
In general, men are being trained these days to avoid approaching women (particularly in public places) due to things like women constantly posting on social media about being afraid of all men in public spaces.
So, basically, you’re gonna have to go up to him and start up the conversation. And don’t be surprised if he seems nervous and tries to leave as fast as possible.
Be straight forward and direct