So me [22 F] and this guy [22 M] started talking 2 years ago. We both had been through bad breakups. I was really nice to this guy, but it kinda fizzled out in a month. But he says he has caught feelings for me and says we are married in his head. I have been declining his invites for dates and have been really honest about the fact that I dont have any feelings for him. However, he says that He is madly in love with me and would hurt himself if I dont be in a relationship with him. He says, “you’re mine”, “I love you”, “Be with me” etc. Im really worried that if I cut him off, he will hurt himself. Help me out please.
31 comments
This guy is being creepy and manipulative, you should absolutely cut him off, block him and don’t feel any guilt about it. His actions are not your responsibility.
cut. all. contact.
This is one of the biggest red flags in existence. Whatever you do, don’t give in.
I agree with the other comments, cut him off and stop all contact
Cut off all contact. Immediately. This guy is clearly trying to manipulate you emotionally, attempting to guilt you into a relationship.
You’ve tried being nice, it hasn’t worked. His behaviour will only get worse. Nows the time to cut it off.
Tell him to stop talking to you and block.
Block him and stop talking to him. Whatever he does afterwards is his choice.
I went out with this girl once and she had a group of friends including this creepy dude called Dan who kept making suggestive comments about what he wanted to do to her and she ended up going to a house party with the friends but I didn’t know them so I wasn’t invited.
Although she didn’t act upset, she told me later that Dan had spiked her drink and raped her. She wouldn’t go to the police though because she was Christian and didn’t want her parents to know that she was sexually active and I couldn’t tell the police because I didn’t know the friend group. She became really distant after that and went away to a university 120 miles away where she ended up cheating on me but would call me in tears telling me all the depraved things he forced her to do.
His wellbeing is not your responsibility. Period.
What’s your downside here? Call his bluff…screw that manipulating dumbass.
Block his number/social media. Get the paperwork for a restraining order ready.
Cut contact. He’s being creepy. If he threatens to hurt or kill himself call the police.
Goodness. Whatever he decides to do or not do in his life is not your responsibility. However, you are responsible for your own actions. One of which has been your decision to maintain contact with this person. Doing so has left the door open for him to keep believing this relationship is viable.
It’s time to block him and go completely NO CONTACT. Completely. No excuses. Also. It’s important to alwaysock your doors and never answer your door to him.
You need to be strong, OP.
Eww. Cut him off. By continuing to interact with him, he continues with his delusions. You need to stop interacting with him
Goodbye! Whatever he does is his problem.
His actions are on him. He’s manipulating you because you refuse to give him what he wants. It’s normal to be concerned for his safety. Manipulative assholes are still human. I get that, but even if he does hurt himself (highly doubt he will), it’s his fault, not yours.
Op you need to cut all contact. This guy is nuts. I know what it’s like to feel responsible for their well being by providing them contact, I’ve been in that spot before, but you need to look out for yourself and what this guy is doing to you is incredibly unfair and abusive
Best of luck to you
Anytime someone says this they 99.99999% of the time don’t do anything. He’s manipulating you. Cut him off.
I have been through something incredibly similar. Not the same amount of time but scarily similar from the details you provided. I cut contact finally after spending so much time feeling miserable because I felt like I couldn’t leave. It was horrible but my mental state cleared up a lot after I blocked him. The person in my experience also threatened things to me. If you need to talk about anything further please don’t hesitate to reach out!
Run
You need to block him and get some distance. This is how murder podcasts start.
If he threatens to harm himself, call the emergency line, you aren’t equipped to handle his mental health issues.
100% block
I don’t know. Someone who likes you that much might be worth a second look.
He’s deranged. Get a restraining order agsinst him immediately. Men like this become dangerous stalkers and even kill the women who they fixate on. Take his threats seriously. Cut off all communication. Go to the police and do not let them blow you off as if hes not dangerous.
A sweet girl in our town had a boyfriend like this. She tried breaking up with him and somehow he got her into his car and drove straight into a tree going highway speed and killed the both of them. Be careful. Take all precautions.
cut all contact, you might feel bad but it’s best. It’s best for him and yourself. He will learn eventually. He clearly doesn’t know how relationships work.
He is not your responsibility and is trying to manipulate you. You need to just cut him off. He’s being obsessive and I’d be concerned if he develops an “if I can’t have you, no one can” mindset. For your own safety and mental well-being you need to stop talking to him
Call police/ambulance to him for a wellness check and warn his family.
Cut him off
He’s full of shit
He sounds like he may try to hurt you. Block him, distance yourself. Let family and friends know about this person just in case anything happens.
Been there done that, it’s best to just block them. They’re just the same as an abusive husband doing everything to control his wife. It won’t become a relationship so cut off contact. Please stay safe in case he goes psycho. It’s hard but u get over it and then it’s nothing.