Does anyone else’s husband “like” a lot of memes that are about “boyfriend/girlfriend,” “dating,” or just overall sex related? I have some suspicions about my husband possibly talking to someone online; maybe an emotional affair, or just doing something he shouldn’t be doing. He denies it, but keeps his phone locked, won’t show me his phone, and is constantly on social media.

There are a couple of women he follows that he follows across all of his social media accounts and he constantly is commenting and liking their content. He has even lied/embellished actual things that have happened just to have something relevant to say on their posts. I’ve had proof and called him out on it.

I’ve tagged him, posted things etc. and he doesn’t like them or comment on them. He very very rarely likes memes related to marriage, “husband/wife,” or anything like that. Our sex life is almost non-existent. If he sees a meme or post on social media that he wants to share with me, he NEVER tags me in it like everyone else does; he screen shots it, or shares it via text.

I’ve brought it up to him and he just tells me “just because I like something doesn’t mean it relates to me.” Which I get…when it’s once in a while.

I guess it just rubs me the wrong way. Anyone else have any experience with this?

5 comments

  1. Sounds sketchy but could be harmless..I would let him think you let your guard down and just be extra observant. If you have a family plan cell phone see if you can turn on location. Maybe log into messenger or just tell him to let you see his phone…if he argues and pulls the you don’t trust me card and never shows you or will show you later after he had time to delete then I’m sorry to say he’s not being honest

  2. Body language will give it away…watch if he jerks away or turns his screen off or closes out a tab..if you can tell he is acting like he doesn’t want you to see something then he probably doesn’t want you to see something

  4. At some point in my former marriage, my ex started taking me for granted. She stopped posting about me, stopped commenting on my posts, stopped hanging out with me, and basically was no longer my biggest fan. But she continued to do this for other people. It totally sucked. It was all part of her emotionally abandoning me and our marriage, and it sucked.

    After my wife left me and I had a do over, I swore I’d never be taken advantage of like that again. Life is too short. Romance and kindred love are too important to me. I still feel that way and think my current partner has the same expectations of me. It’s magical.

    I think it’s super important that our spouse be our biggest fan and advocate. We deserve it. And it’s part of being life partners together. What he is doing to you right now is unkind. I feel like it’s emotional cheating/trysts despite his comments otherwise. You deserve better. This assumes of course you in turn are his biggest advocate and ally too — it works both ways 😁

    I’d insist he treat you better. If he won’t, then its time for marriage counseling IMHO.

    We all deserve to be appreciated. Good luck!

    Edit:

    I just read some of your past posts. Your husband sounds like a conniving ass. I see a lot of my ex wife in his behavior. When our marriage ended it was liberating! Now I have control and visibility into my finances and retirement. I have a partner who treats me well. And basically I just enjoy life so much more. Depending on your state, you’ll get spousal support. It sounds like he hides money like my ex — that will sting in the near term, and odds are he’ll get away with some, but long term you’ll get a fresh start. I’ll never give up financial control again.

    If you’re committed enough to learning more, you can pull a credit report. Also, call banks and charm the phone person — play dumb, say you’re the wife, does he have an account there. They won’t give you details but will tell you if he has a secret account there. One super kind teller gave me all my ex wifes bank statements too. That helped in my negotiations.

    Good luck!

  5. All boils down to if you trust him or not? Learned over the many years of relationship experience worrying about them cheating doesn’t change anything. If you don’t have trust for them then that’s basically the end of things. Unfortunately for me I got with somebody who never had trust due to whatever issues she had growing up. For me it got old being accused of it nonstop for years so yup I locked my phone and that solved a lot of it. Nothing like being woken up with somebody yelling at you because they got into your phone and saw a conversation with somebody I’ve known since I was 12 talking about general life stuff. I’m just not a fan of being accused of cheating and people can and will make everything seem like you’re out to cheat due to their self esteem or trust issues.

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