Last night, I was hanging out with my close friends. We were playing board games, drinking, and simply having a good time. My girlfriend and I had just got off of the phone and she had told me she was going to sleep and I wished her goodnight. The next morning, I noticed she called me 7 times while I was sleeping. She called me the 8th time and she was furious about the fact that I didn’t text her while I was there and that I didn’t let her know I made it home that night. I will admit, I believe it was my fault for not atleast telling her when I got home. However, I believe she was over reacting about the fact that she wanted me to talk to her, after saying she was going to sleep? She broke up with me because of this and I don’t know how to feel about it and really unsure if what I did was that bad. Thoughts?
24 comments
good riddance, you dodged a gigantic bullet.
Sounds like she did you a favor.
That’s crazy
She was looking for an excuse to dump OP. Block number, move on.
You didn’t do anything wrong. Your ex-girlfriend has some major issues and clearly needs therapy. She did you huge favor consider yourself lucky.
You did nothing wrong. If I tell somebody good night I don’t expect anymore communication from them that night. Don’t worry, find somebody more normal and less controlling
She sounds like an immature little princess. You’re probably better off without her.
Are you guys like 14? This seens very immature
Be happy that you dodged a bullet. This is very controlling and insecure behavior. When your partner is not with you, let them be.
Last I checked, telling someone goodnight means you’re done talking to them until the following day. It’s stupid to keep texting someone you know is sleeping. If I kept hearing text notifications while I was trying to sleep, I’d be pretty angry. Are you a child? Why do you need to check in when you get home?
Are you dating someone with the mentality of a child? I mean I’d be upset if my boyfriend didn’t at least text me that he got home safely, but I wouldn’t break up with him over that or not texting me after I told him I was going to sleep. Seems a little extreme.
Agree with most…you dodged a bullet. If she’s immature enough to be this irrational and this over-the-top in her reaction to something this utterly meaningless, what’s she going to be like when there an *actual* problem?
What if your driving or in a meeting and can’t text?. What if your tired and fall asleep? What if God forbid your phone goes dead or you get in a dead reception zone? I remember when there were no phones when you left the house. The good old days!
Dude, I’ve seen this scene so many times. There’s gonna be times (specially depending on your emotional maturity) when you’re gonna fall for that shit, but the reality is that she is the selfish side of the coin, she’s making you feel bad for having a good time, I don’t think that’s ok.
Eventually you’ll find out that just because someone is mad at you doesn’t mean that they’re right.
You have no fault for what you have done, do not let her manipulate you into being someone who wants to balance the burden of the guilt even though you have nothing to do with that shit.
Your ex sounds really selfish
Congratulations, now you never have to worry about failing to read her mind to discover what unreasonable and uncommunicated expectations she has again. Consider this a bullet dodged.
Good for you! It sounds to me that she was looking for an excuse to break up with you. If she genuinely wanted to receive a message from you that much, she could’ve asked you to write to her while she was on the phone with you. She shouldn’t have expected you to continue any form of communication after she had made it crystal clear that she was going to sleep.
There’s a part of me that says, sit her down reason with her and you could get back together. However, this is a VERY insecure girl. So is she worth waiting to see if she can grow up? Only you can answer that.
I had something similar happen when dating my now wife. I had bought a ceiling fan and was bringing my buddy to help me hang it in her apartment. My buddy wasn’t moving very swiftly and we were hours later than I had originally told her. She was furious with me while I was wondering what all the fuss was about, thought she’d be happy with my surprise. Later on I found out that she was actually upset with herself that she was so worried about me. She realized that night her feelings for me where much deeper than she realized.
If this is fairly new and/or there were other issues, it’s probably time to walk away.
Wow. Here I am making sure my phone is on dnr because if I get a text or call while sleeping, they know they have awoken the dragon and I will light them up. But what is she, like 19? I’m 45 tomorrow. I have more important things to do than control someone else.
You did nothing wrong kiddo. Don’t let her manipulate you. Honestly, next time laugh and say thank you. It’ll piss her off and you’ll be epic.
Never date a person who expects you to be a mind-reader. You will never win.
If she wanted you to text her “I’m home!” she should have told you beforehand. If she wanted you to text her while she was asleep – the same. Good for you that you are free now.
>I don’t know how to feel about it and really unsure if what I did was that bad. Thoughts?
There are two outstanding scenarios in my mind:
1) She’s for real. That means she clearly has issues with clinginess and cannot deal with healthy relationships at the moment, which require a respect for privacy and some personal space.
Bullet dodged.
2) She’s putting you thru some shitty “relationship test”, in which case, don’t even fucking bother.
Bullet _fucking_ dodged Neo style.
Move on from this one, OP. I don’t know what it is about today, but a lot of posts today sum up to “I gotta get down there and muck around in the shit to distill it’s true shitty essence.” No. You don’t. Just flush it down a toilet.
Not trying to excuse her behavior butttt…
1. Has she been cheated on in the past
2. Have you done anything to trigger this emotion. Even if you don’t think you did? Guys are oblivious to this kind of stuff
3. Are any of your friends shady? That she feels insecure to have you around them thinking you’ll fall into temptation.
4. Did she go through your phone and found something that doesn’t align with your relationship values?
Its easy to say bullet dodged but there’s two sides to the story. You guys are young so its probably not worth staying with her if shes damaged from a previous relationship. You will work on her and then she will leave you, I see this all the time with friends. If its something you did but shes not comfortable telling you, I would try to figure that out so you don’t mess up in your next relationship.
I think there’s more to why she reacted that way. Don’t downvote me y’all, be open to different perspectives. I think it’s a perfect growing opportunity for both then to talk this through if shes willing
I understand being mad that you didn’t text her you were home, but breaking up with you is definitely an overreaction
Dodged a bullet
She did you a huge favor. You can do way better than her