Each year as spring and summer comes along, I’ve grown to despise it even though the weather is great and everything is open, businesses are thriving etc. Everyone is out enjoying, being social, just living happy lives just as I want to do, but I’m alone. I’ve become completely cut off from any kind of bond with anyone and it kills me inside that I have never been able to experience a ‘normal’ summer out with friends and just living life without constantly questioning my actions or doubting myself since I’m insecure and self-conscious.
I’m 26 so it’s a little hard to make really decent friends these days, I’m still in college and most of my friends from high school etc all work and have no time during the summer. I haven’t made any friends in college because most of my classes were from home during the pandemic. I should be able to enjoy things now that the college exams are finally over and I’ve worked my ass off for months for them.
It’s a double-edged sword because the weather is so nice out so you almost have to go out or you’d feel guilty for not taking advantage of it. But obviously on the other hand as soon as you go out and try to do normal ‘summery’ things you quickly realise it’s gonna be a constant battle of anxiety, sadness, loneliness from seeing the rest of humanity living it up without you.
I’m sure I’m not the only one that goes through this? I’m really wondering how to make some new friends.
2 comments
Hmm, you could try exposing yourself to more people.
I’m 5 years younger than you and I’ve never had friends at all in my life. Used to it at this point. The human in me does want to be around people, but i ignore it because it’s not worth it in the long run. Already learned my lesson.
I’d just find some stuff to take your mind off it. Been gaming/working/exercising for the Summer after a nerve wracking semester.
You have to join something where you can talk to people regularly. Something like: a hobby/interest group, an adult ed class, an outdoors club, an adult recreational sports team, volunteer work, a youth-oriented church group, a political action club. Really anything will work, as long as it’s REGULAR. (at least weekly)
Then, you strike up conversations with people who interest you, develop a good rapport with them, and talk to them each time you see them. After a few great conversations (before, during or after the thing you’re involved in), then it’s time to INVITE them to do something with you.
Like grab a bite to eat, go for a walk or run, shop for something, do an errand together, check out a new part of town, hang at your place (or a coffee shop) for some video gaming, whatever.
That’s how you make friends as an adult. Now is a great time to do that!