Living together after breaking up 2 days ago

I(19F) broke up with my boyfriend(23M) of almost 2 years, because he just refused to try to connect emotionally with me. I tried to communicate that I felt distant between us constantly. He even broke up with me about 3 times because “I am too emotional”, but I struggle with extreme codependency and other mental issues so I always begged for him back, especially because I worked a minimum wage job and was terrified I wouldn’t be able to afford to live solo.

Well, recently, I’ve started a new job where I made a really good amount of money. The people there were people who have lived similar lives as me, and welcomed me in like a family and really started encouraging me to get my shit together. So, after bringing up to my boyfriend that I felt he didn’t care much about my emotions because he never seems upset or supportive when I’ve been in terrible situations, including when my ex manager assaulting me, and my ex boyfriend abused me terribly. Instead of being supportive and understanding, my boyfriend gets super defensive and says I’m overreacting because he does care, but not so deeply as to get mad. Then when that makes me upset, I start crying uncontrollably. And what does he do? Laugh in my face.

In that moment I finally snapped and broke up with him. I can tell he has obviously lost the little feelings he even had for me. And he didn’t care that I broke up with him. He still claimed to love me and have some feelings for me, but that we are just too different. I feel as this is an excuse for him to not mature and learn empathy skills, because it is everyone he lacks empathy for. His own friends have vented to me about my boyfriend not being there for them in times of distress.

And other than that, my boyfriend was a great person to be around. He never judged my personality (unless I brought up how emotional I was and he would get confused and frustrated bc he couldn’t grasp why I was upset) and we were always laughing, cuddling, cooking together,ect. He even bought me stuff out of kindness sometimes such as food and appliances.

I spent almost 2 years with him, and I’ve been with him almost every day. We do have separate rooms, but our lease isn’t done until April of next year. I’ve tried to get out of the house since then, but it also hurts to be around the new friends I made because all they can tell me is that I have to figure everything out by myself. I’m super scared. I’ve never been alone before. I hate my own company as well because I’m never usually alone.

In the back of my head I want him to come to some realization, and mature a little and try to mend our relationship. But I am aware that probably won’t happen since he’s already broken up with me a few times. So now, I just cry in my room while I hear him laughing and playing video games with his friends all day and night. He doesn’t even think about me. I’ve tried to talk to him a bit, because I don’t want it to be THAT awkward between us since we are still living together. I don’t have any other options for other living arrangements at the moment, and I can’t afford to live here alone as the rent is super expensive and we split it.

I’ve spent all my time here just hoping he comes knocking at my door with a change of heart, but he doesn’t. He won’t even look/speak to me when I have to pass his room to get to the kitchen. I literally feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. I can barely eat. The past 2 nights, I keep waking up like 10 times throughout the night with my heart pounding and sick feeling in my stomach. I have no motivation to do anything.

My birthday is next weekend, and we had so many plans, and now I have nothing. He’ll probably be out having fun with his friends. We were supposed to do a lot of fun things this weekend for the 4th of July but now he’s going to a friends house instead. I just don’t understand why he doesn’t care about me after so long of us spending every day together.

I know I need time to better my self love and stuff but I feel like I’m going into a deep dark hole. I really don’t want to be alone. I want someone to hold me and talk to me every night like we would.
I can’t stop randomly crying. It’s so hard knowing he’s a room away but he’s happy and wants nothing to do with me.

Deep down I know unless he magically changes, this was for the best as the relationship was making me feel like I have no worth and to constantly question myself. But now I’m really feeling that way since he doesn’t care we broke up, and I just have to sit in here and hear him have fun. I don’t even want to get out of bed anymore.

What is my best course of action here?? Should I just let time take its course?

TL;DR: living with my boyfriend I just broke up with, and seeing him not care is crushing me. what should I do?