Is my buddy being unreasonable or was I in the wrong?

Recently, I got a really solid job offer with better pay and much better insurance and ended up taking it. My buddy and I have worked together at 2 different companies over the last 10 years, I’d say he is one of my best friends. He put in a good word for me at the company I’m leaving.

He is saying that I’m stabbing him in the back, going against him and that he will never do a favor for me ever again. I talked to him on the phone and he says I’m not thinking about the future and am making a terrible mistake because he thinks the current company is much better.

I haven’t talked to him in a couple days and the last phone conversation was tense. Am I in the wrong for leaving a company that he put in a hell of a recommendation for me or is he being unreasonable?

Edit for context: We aren’t young, I’m in my late thirties, he’s in his forties.

Edit 2: These aren’t just standard retail or office jobs. They are working with construction/ag equipment. Typically a tight knit, competitive industry where people stay in the industry for a lifetime.

20 comments
  1. Bro nah he acting like a bitch and hating on your success, I wouldn’t keep a mf like that around cabrón.

  2. Your friend is weird, your getting a job with better pay and benefits, take it.

    Always always put yourself first with jobs

  3. You have to do what you think is best for. Time will tell if you made the right decision or not. Hopefully, he gets over it and you can get past it.

  4. Wait for heads to cool and revisit the issue. Relationships, including friendships, will have problems and fights. They are a normal.

  5. Not much of friend if he shits himself when you try and better your situation.

  6. It’s not college anymore where you take classes with your buddies. You’re trying to better your life. He needs to tone it down

  7. If you just got the job 6 months ago then I can see reason for a discussion. But if you’ve been there quite a while he should respect you found a positive move.

  8. I think he feels like you’re leaving him and not just the job. Of course if he did recommend you and you’ve only been there a few weeks, I’d be upset too. But if you’ve been there a while, he’ll get over it

  9. Putting a good word in for you was him being a good friend. Guilting you into staying at your current company for his own gain is not. If he wanted what’s best for you then he’d be happy for you no matter what. Simple as that!

  10. It might not be about you at all. What if you changing forces him to answer himself the question why HE doesn’t change? (Just because people in this industry usually don’t? Who cares?) He might have been feeling of needing a change himself but he hasn’t done anything about it so far, and now he feels off. The times of slavery are gone, we all are contracted employees to the companies, and the contracts can be ended, if you get an offer that is better than the current one.
    There are some industries where the fluctiation is low in the companies, but it doesn’t mean that you are not allowed to make decisions.

  11. He should be happy for you. Hes way out of line (depending on specific details)

  12. He’s being a little cunt. But he loves you. Let him get over it and then invite him to see your new job.

  13. Your friend is disappointed. Just because you are good friends doesn’t mean you will see everything the same way. You have to do what is best for you and your family. Right or wrong, you made your decision. No point in looking back. Your friend’s feelings on the matter have to do with his perspective and judgements. They have nothing to do with you.

  14. If you have a friend that isn’t excited about you bettering your position in life, that isn’t a friend.

  15. He’s sad that he’s losing a friend. You’ll be spending much less time together when you leave the company. That said, he’s totally out of line.

  16. If you were my friend we’d be celebrating our asses off cuz that’s what real friends do

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